Tag: self-love

The PBS Blog Podcast – Ep 6 Be Gentle with Yourself

Today’s episode is about being patient and gentle with yourself. We already spoke about responsibility and discipline. If you set a goal and you didn’t meet that goal, don’t beat yourself over the head. We need time to grow physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually, and professionally in whatever we are doing. This is a process. It even takes time to heal. Give yourself that time. Don’t verbally abuse yourself and talk down to yourself. There are plenty of people in the world who will do that for you. Spare yourself the added abuse by being gentle with yourself.

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Episode 6 – Be Gentle with Yourself

Controlling the Energy Around You

As many of you know, I’ve been doing lots of personal reflection. My focus has been on healing and love. This included taking some extensive time off to spend with Yah, my family, embracing solitude and doing more writing.

In this process, I’ve learned a lot about myself (still learning), got to spend time with my mom, finished two books and moved to Georgia.

Long story short, this break has paid off in more ways than one and I want to share with you something I shared with my Bimonthly email list already. That is, learning to control the energy around you so that you’re more positive, have more energy, are happier and accomplishing more.

To start, I’ve been practicing this by training my mind to be more positive.

Positive Thoughts

Many are already talking about the power of positive thinking, but how does that look in action?

What I’ve come to understand about the power of thought is how much our thoughts contribute to our physical well-being.

We can literally control the energy around us by the quality of our thoughts.

This means that I cannot focus my thoughts on the negative all day, every day and expect to be happy and energetic. If you wake up complaining, go to work complaining, blog your complaints, Tweet and Facebook your complaints, how do you (realistically speaking) expect to have a good day?

This includes limiting what my ears hear and what my eyes see. I can think positively but thinking positive is not enough.

I must also eliminate negative people, places, and things from my life that influences the way that I think.

Why is this important? Because we cannot heal in the same environment that broke us.

I’ve found that watching and listening to what is less negatively stimulating can help me to think less negatively. 

An example of this online is following more positive minded people on social media and accounts that encourage and build up instead of tear down. I removed those persons whose energy brought me down and followed those whose energy built me up. This doesn’t mean those I removed are bad people or that I love them less. It means that I love myself enough to protect my energy.

This process of falling back in love with ourselves begins with setting standards for what we will and will not tolerate. This is important because you teach people how to love you based on what you allow to take place.

Mental Rest

My break has been more so about mental rejuvenation more than physically. Being tired all the time does not necessarily mean that you’ve had a productive day. It may mean that you are busy but it doesn’t always mean that you’ve been productive. Sometimes it means it is mental rest that you need.

Because the spiritual (mind) and the physical (body) is connected, once we control the way we think we automatically control the way that we feel. Sure, I can get more hours of sleep (and I should) but…

ultimately it is my excitement and passion about the good in my life that will fill me up with positive and empowering energy.

Or, it is my depressed demeanor that will do the opposite.

Your mind can tire you out or fill you up.

For this, I am personally striving to cut down on complaining and worrying by focusing instead on positive thoughts and alternatives. This is not easy, is a daily process, and also means not allowing others to project their negative energy onto me. Giving into other people’s problems or letting people complain to us too much can drain our energy and leave us empty.

Being an ear is great but there’s a difference between being supportive and just letting people dump their issues in our laps.

We are not toilets and shouldn’t allow ourselves to be used.

Do not misunderstand me: Venting can be a good thing. Having someone to talk to is mentally healthy but in the words of Rudy Francisco:

“Some people will take until you have nothing left and then hold a grudge against your hands for being empty.”

Next, we’ll talk about some backlashes to the new and positive you and how to stay encouraged despite them. In a world this cold anything good is bound to be met with opposition. This should not surprise us. In fact, we should prepare for it.

Sips of Nourishment

Take the time every now and again to step back and to refresh parts of your soul that no one sees. Stay in your studies and send up prayers and meditation to quench the thirst of questions that no man can answer. Everyone laughs at faith until desperation strolls into our lives wearing a smirk and holding a sickle in his right hand. He is here to reap and leave the malnourished one empty. Everyone believes in something when the catastrophe ensues and no one is laughing any longer. Don’t be like those laughing at creation and yet calling on a god when things go wrong. Keep yourself full of hope and expectation no person can touch. Exercise both your body and your mind and it’ll work wonders for you in the end. Read books and study to nourish that beautiful mind of yours so no one makes a prey of you through philosophy and deceit. Sing, dance, praise and laugh like the crazy person you are. How dare you cloak yourself in positive vibes and radiate a smile brighter than the sun? Only if you keep yourself filled with light can you shine. Take these sips of nourishment to sustain you so that in the daily grind that is your life, while you’re busy surviving, you do not forget to live.

Keep Yourself Full

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Hey, guys! How have you been? I missed you so much and many thanks to those of you who have reached out to me during my time away to make sure I was OK. I appreciate you.

I’ve been wonderful and though I’ve only been gone a few weeks, that time is so much longer in blog days :-).

And I am scheduled for more traveling this weekend.

While I managed to stay away from Facebook, Twitter, this blog and my email until this past Saturday, I broke my Insta-silence when, while walking down the streets of Chicago with my sister, someone recognized me. At first, I was going to just walk away but I noticed the woman was trying to pronounce my name. I finished it for her.

“e-see-lee-yah.”
“I have your book!” said the woman.
“Really? Wow.”
“I follow you on Facebook.”
“Really?”

And so we chatted it up, took a picture, and she missed her bus. It was a wonderful feeling and very inspiring.

Being away from the blog has produced a surprising increase in views and subscribers since I did pretty much nothing.
30+ Views and Visitors a day
50+ new subscribers
4 New Book Reviews
2 New Goodreads Ratings
16 New Twitter Followers

 

If you need to take a break from blogging, writing, or whatever, it’s OK. We will still be here when you get back. You may even grow in the process. It’s all about recharging and Keeping Yourself Full which leads me to my next bit of news…

Introducing…

Keep Yourself Full

“To Heal the Hurting, Lift the Fallen, and Restore the Broken.”

About this Book:

KEEP YOURSELF FULL is a short book of spiritual rejuvenation to keep you charged and YOUR reminder that life is about more than just surviving, but making the greatest impact you can while you are here. It is about caring about something greater than yourself. There’s only one problem:

many of us are so depressed that we don’t have enough of ourselves to give to others.

We’ve heard it all before: “Hurt people, hurt people.” When people are limited and insecure and hurting they pass this energy onto others. When you are low yourself, when you’re not full, you unconsciously send out the same kind of energy and you begin to treat others how you feel about yourself.

Imagine if more people felt good about themselves and projected that energy. Imagine if you could vibrate higher.

Empowering others is great but first, you must be empowered. Sharing is wonderful but you cannot serve from an empty vessel. In every instance, you must come first since you cannot give what you don’t already own. Only after you have loved yourself can you love others.

Keeping Yourself Full is about investing in your own well-being first so that you can be of service to others. It is a building process that reveals little by little our purpose as we overcome ourselves.

You will not always be motivated and anyone who says that is not being real. There is a time for everything, even war. The fact remains that you will not always be peaceful and everyday ain’t beautiful.

What we have to learn to be is disciplined so that we can think logically instead of emotionally and so that we can train our mind not to take everything so personally.

Everything people do and say is not a reflection of you. When we rid ourselves of these kinds of burdens, we break free.

You can be happy today, but without a shift in perspective, this happiness will not last.

You must change the way that you think to change the way that you feel.

Healthy self-care nourishes the quality of our  life and is necessary for stopping the cycle of depression, abuse, and suicide.

You cannot serve from an empty vessel. You must keep yourself full.

Coming Soon

To Speak or Not to Speak

Be careful what it is you’re speaking over your life. What you say you are is what you become. Words are spiritual and often we invite negative energies into our space simply by speaking it into existence. Many of you stay negative because your speech is negative and your thoughts are negative. Understand that the brain conforms to whatever idea is pressed upon it. Vibrate higher. Speak healing over your life.

Peace 💕

Her

I’ve grown an extra set of eyes just to catch the shadow in her walk. Micro-managed every detail of her smile, every light in her footsteps, and every scar in her heart. I stalk her intentions and pick out pieces of glass that may have found themselves in her thoughts when the levees poured over when the skies darkened and there was no light; when the glass broke. I scan her body with the intrigue of a man caught lusting for the first time. You see I need to make sure that her back is not bent, that her shoulders are sharp, and her head held high. I am intrigued with tasting her words before they exit her mouth, and I refuse to release my stare from the interior of her mind. I understand that my ways can be likened to that of a stalker but tell me, is it too much to zoom into her soul every morning to make sure that she smiles? Is it too much to hover over her sleeping eyes and find my way into her dreams? You see I have to make sure that she’s not distracted by destruction. I can never stop watching this woman’s ways and monitoring her heart. If I am to be of assistance to anyone it starts with her because she is me.

Why Are YOU Worth It?

I’m not asking you about:

Twitter followers…

IG followers…

Blog followers….

FB likes….

This is about YOU.

Why are YOU worth it?

Of course, I do not expect an answer. You aren’t doing this for me. It’s a deeply personal question that we should each ask ourselves daily. And it is a question that needs an answer. Comments disabled.