The trees have sealed the spots where the leaves are attached, not allowing fluids to flow in and out of them, which change color and fall off. The falling of the leaves does more than mark the season, it also helps the tree survive the cold, dry air of winter. Humans are also preparing for the dropping temperatures of the colder months. Where fire places are lit, winter blankets make their resurrection and even men’s hearts grow cold with the heightened stress and violence that occur during the holidays. As November eases its way in and we prepare to wrap up another year, my thoughts settle upon change.
It’s not always easy to embrace change. It is something that happens so frequently in our lives and yet remains something new; moving in and out of our day with the same glide as oil to a pan. Starting with a puddle and then auctioning pieces of itself off into different directions. This is not easy for us to do; to forgo tradition for a road less traveled by. To be reborn in a way that blows our minds and challenges us to become different. To think and to act in a way that is new; to adapt to a foreign idea or practice.
Those crippling brown leaves, the ones that have hardened across our front yards, begging to be burned or thrown into the trash are not pleasant to see. But if the tree did not embrace the change coming upon it, sealing the spots where the leaves grow, it would die. When spring brings warm air and fresh water, the tree will sprout new leaves and start growing again.
Like the unmovable tree, standing so bold against the bite of winter, and naked with vulnerability, I challenge you to change your routine for the sake of incorporating a new experience into your daily lives. Mine will be getting back into my workout routine, and cutting back on snacks.
While change can be difficult, it comes with a kind of strength that can only be experienced to define, and has the potential to open us up to endless possibilities, causing our minds to stretch beyond the limit. Embracing change, in short, frees us from the captivity of routine, and the stagnancy of ritual.
I don’t know who wrote this but I had to share it. It’s so true. We only work and spend our time according to how we see ourselves. Meaning that if we don’t think we are worthy then we are not going to value our time and therefore not do anything with it. Taking time to spend alone and reflect is not something that is optional for me. I believe that mental health is just as imperative as physical health but is highly underrated. Rarely do we consider mental clarity or offer exercises to help to maintain that kind of balance in our lives. Mental stability is just as important to me as physical health. Taking care of myself helps me to have the endurance to take care of others. Prayer, meditation, and just overall quite time gives me a chance to listen to my own thoughts, cultivate new writing ideas and examine where I am right now in my life, my goals, and those things that need to be improved. It helps me to be of service to my husband and to my community. The same way that reading and studying helps to exercise my brain, quite time and reflection help to clear my mind and organize my thoughts. For us to truly value our time I believe what the quotes says, we must first value ourselves. We have to know our worth in order to know what we’re worth. Only when we believe that we are truly worth it, will we have what it takes to truly appreciate these moments that too soon become memories.
There are two kinds of walls that hinder us in our lives. The first wall is there naturally and I wouldn’t even call it a wall. It is more like a warning; that blockage there to indicate a possible or impending danger. It exists to stop you from being involved in situations that do you harm or that cause you to make a life altering mistake. It’s that internal alarm that rings, warning you that something is not right, something does not vibe, or that something is about to go wrong.
Some people call it anxiety, fear or paranoia and while these exists, this feeling is none of these. You’re not paranoid. Your body is just telling you that something is wrong. Sometimes it happens when you’re around certain people. Sometimes you’ll say, “It’s something about him or her”. That’s because when the vibe isn’t right, the entire body reacts.
I remember having that feeling when I was eighteen years old. I was out on a date and I got this extreme nervous, anxiety feeling. I wanted to turn around but felt it was too late as we were already entering the restaurant. That night ended with me in the hospital and five staples in my head.
We were jumped by a group of men and women. There were just too many of them. We were thankful to make it out alive.
Even so, not all walls are natural internal clocks. Some walls are built by us.
Sometimes the wall exists because you built it. A person cannot move their hand to do what the mind does not already believe it is capable of doing. Not having the strength to persist is one thing but having the strength and choosing not to be strong is another thing entirely. Growth isn’t always what you can see but we often walk by sight and not faith. As such, we hinder ourselves because we didn’t really believe it was possible.
I know that people say to “Believe in yourself”, but that’s the problem. I don’t believe achieving anything of value is about believing in yourself but in something greater than you. But you do have to reach inside of yourself and find that excitement for the possibilities. Not even that you’ve made it, because none of us have, but the mere possibility. As my sister says, have a now faith not just a future faith. Rejoice on the journey, not just the arrival. And while the goal is so much bigger than you, the choice to begin starts with you.
There’s a quote by Andrew Murphy that says, “You’re confined only by the walls you build yourself”.
“People only work within the confines of how they perceive themselves, and when your self-esteem is low, that perception is usually far from the truth. You won’t be successful until you believe that you are truly worthy of it.” – Stephanie Lennox
Sometimes it’s worth considering that we’re not limited by resources, or understanding, or support but by our own walls. It’s mind over matter. It’s like people who sit down for a card game and proclaim, “I’m not really good”. I guess you’re not. You took yourself out of the equation before you even started. These are the walls we build.
Ultimately, the only time anything possesses power over us is when we weaken ourselves.
The only time anything negative possesses power over us is when we weaken ourselves. Indeed, darkness will be there lets face it, just as the sun rises it also sets. Still, light prevails and if you’re looking closely enough you’ll see that sometimes growth comes from knowing tomorrow’s peace begins with today. Everything is energy and as positive energy is higher than negative energy, a stress-free life begins with operating outside of that negative space. As such one can then use and control the positivity and live with daily productivity, growth and advancement. To control energy. It means that you have the power to change everything around you, for every situation that wishes to show its face today also has a solution. If we’re willing to look close enough we can see the purpose. Yes, its hard but beneath the surface is a purpose and that purpose is to cultivate something in you. If we choose to look close enough, we can discover what that is. If we choose to endure. If we choose light even when it’s lonely. Even when it’s difficult, and even when it’s painful. If we choose to command our peace to be still.
I decided to take a much-needed break from revising my manuscript and sat down to watch a couple episodes of Fringe (now my new favorite TV show. Yes, I know, it came out years ago but I’m new to this). After retiring to my bed and scrolling through Pinterest I was forced to deal with the thought that has been lingering in the back of my mind. The thought was doubt and as I struggled to ignore it, I knew eventually I’d have to face this beast, stop being lazy, and rid it from my consciousness.
As I sit here, typing this, I know I would reread it gazillion times before drafting it in WordPress. I will then preview it a billion more times when it’s drafted in WordPress and I’ll be sure to choose the Justified button for my paragraphs so they look nice and neat. If it’s anything like my usual posting, it’ll be revised in the draft five to six times before I actually push publish and even then I’ll go back to reread it as if I’m not the person who wrote it. I’ll read it on my laptop and then again on my mobile just to make sure it’s formatted correctly. I’ll probably then proceed to share it on social media and go look at it. You know, just to see if it looks right.
If this sounds a bit OCD, then diagnose me now because it’s not an embellishment. Yet despite how hard I strive to ensure the proper crafting and delivering of content online, I sit here and find myself the victim of “what if?” The truth is that I am on the brink of stepping outside of that comfort zone and I’m starting to wonder if I’m good enough. Will the confidence I know I need as a writer be mistaken for arrogance?
Can I be trusted with the responsibility of giving advice or do my readers scan my posts and think that I’m a fool? Yes, I know these thoughts aren’t true and yet, I found myself embracing the possibility that maybe I look silly writing about things that others are so much more knowledgeable of. I sit here and I publish a post with the passion and the authority necessary to own it and yet, I cannot help but wonder.
But then I got a wake-up call. One from Emily Dickerson and one from Verily Mary.
‘Hope’ is the thing with feathers—
That perches in the soul—
And sings the tune without the words—
And never stops—at all—
I realized as I read these words, that if I am to accomplish anything of significance at all, then I must buckle down, rooting myself in hope, the songbird of my soul. As one of my sister’s so eloquently put it, “Hope is your anchor. Stay tied down in your faith.”
Additionally, this was solidified by a post I ran across prior to writing this post. As I stated, I was scrolling through Pinterest and discovered the blog of Verily Mary. Specifically, her post on:
…brought me back. I’ve always published posts on this blog with a certain level of ownership and I realized after reading Mary’s post that it’s not about being puffed up and proud (which I make a consistent effort to stay away from at all cost), but only that writers must own their writing with that same level of authority and devout seriousness or we won’t make it.
Tonight I was reminded that if you know you put your all into something (not just your C work, but your genuine all), then there is no need to feel shame. Mary’s words, like my sister’s, spoke life and I offer them to you with the hope that they’ll inspire you the same as they inspired me. Hold onto Hope and never give up:
“I say all of this to say be gentle with yourself when you write online. Aim for excellence while understanding that you are a different beast altogether when it comes folks like you writing in the blogging world. Your writing may be just as meditative and self-reflective as it is logical and analytical. And just because your type of brand or niche is not as saturated or mainstream does not make it less valid. Keep playing your heartstrings and continue to let their songs spill over on your blogs. Whether 10 people or 1000 people hear them, they still make a sound. And in the end, that is what truly matters.” – Mary, Writer, Blogger
When I developed a passion for writing, I could not foresee what the publishing industry is like today. My vision was always to hold a book in my hands, feel the pages against my fingertips, and smell the fresh ink. It was always to see my name on the cover and read my words behind the pages. And more so, allowing others to take part in this journey by having them to read my words. With eBooks trending, it is no question what the increase and development of technology has done for authors. In short, Self-Publishing would not be where it is today. So it is without question that eBooks and Amazon Kindle has changed the game. However, I read something today that disturbed me a little bit. In one of the Facebook Writing Groups in which I am a part of, a writer was seeking advice on Book Promo. His question had to do with promoting his paperback book. One of the commenters told him he should do away with his paperback and stick to eBook only. Obviously, there is more money in the eBook game.
I do not believe this and I also do not believe this person’s advice is very wise.
As I always say, advice is subjective. It’s always personal. You can take it or leave it because not all of it may apply to you and not all of it is true. However, when it comes to advise or tips about someone’s career path or livelihood, I believe its important to know what you’re talking about. So in this case, it would have been more wise to tell the person (as many people did) to have BOTH an eBook AND paperback version of his book than to say to just do away with the hard-copy.
Many Self-Publishers underestimate the power of hard-copy in this digital world and I do think it is to our disadvantage. The truth is that the paperback has potential to earn you more money than your eBook. The reason is because there’s diversity to the paperback that the eBook just does not have. I’ll explain that more deeply later. For now, let’s look at this:
The stats tell us that the average self-published author will sell fewer than 250 books, and the average published author will sell fewer than 2,000 books. Books are now more cost-effective and easier to access, which has created a wealth of competition. Estimates tell us that one million books are published every year.”
In addition, it is my belief that this less than 250 book sell has a lot to do with a reliance on strict eBook sales. I believe this because an author can sell hundreds of paper-book copies alone at a book signing. First, let us establish something about Amazon Kindle. It’s not hard to become a bestselling author. For some categories all you have to do is sell maybe 100 copies (or less) of your eBook to make the #1 spot. This, according to The Millionaire Digest, is called gaming the system:
You can pick low-competition categories in Amazon and sell as few as ten books (in a particular period) and become a “#1 Amazon best-selling” author. Authors even make their book free through Amazon’s KDP Select program and claim “bestseller” status.
While I think selling 100 books is great, 100 copies of a book sold is a failure in the Traditional Publishing world as compared to, let’s say 10,000 or 100,000 copies. And even that, in Traditional Publishing, is funny. If a publisher printed 15,000 copies, shipped 10,000 and returned 8,000 then technically the author only “sold” 2,000 copies. This is what makes people Self-Publish. Ain’t nobody got time for all of that.
As for my personal opinion, I think one book sold is a success. If you sold 100 you’re a star in my book. But I digress.
The point is that I’m sure we all envisioned that making it to Amazon’s #1 spot requires selling much more than 100 eBooks. This isn’t to say those authors didn’t put in hard work, but that Amazon’s ranking is “iffy” to use an EC term. “Iffy” meaning ranks are not calibrated based solely on books sold alone. The truth is that Self-Publishing is hard work and for this reason many people have chosen the Hybrid Publishing method, which I actually think is interesting. I don’t have a lot of knowledge about it because I’ve yet to try Hybrid (I’m not a middle ground type person) but nonetheless, Hybrid Publishing is:
The hybrid author is someone who has book deals with traditional presses, but also self-publishes, or publishes in some other nontraditional way. Hybrid publishing encompasses the middle ground between traditional and self-publishing.”
Publishing using a combination of Traditional and Self-Publishing methods is an interesting thing. Though I’m Indie all the way, I don’t play the cool kid game. Traditional or Self-Pub, I like them both and I think Hybrid Publishing is on the come up. But this is precisely my point. (Though I am learning now that Hybrid Publishing is nothing more than Vanity Publishing. I don’t have the facts on that so I’ll just stick to what I know, but this is what I’ve heard.)
Because Self-Publishing is hard work, Indie Authors miss out on A LOT by opting out of print books. Someone in the group mentioned that the only people who will purchase your paperback are family members. This is also not true. According to Publishing expert Lou Aronica, self-publishers cannot afford to ignore print, as it still accounts for some two-thirds of book sales overall. “Print is not going away,” Lou said, “and outside of the US print is seriously not going to be a minority percentage anytime soon.” Lou goes on:
Ebooks are the preferred method of reading for a large percentage of readers and that will only get larger as the international markets reach their inflection point.
People won’t pay $12.99, but they’ll pay $9.99 — for e-books I’ve seen absolutely no price resistance up to $9.99. In fact $2.99 sometimes sends the wrong message. (With the exception of romance, because romance readers are different, the velocity of reading is different.)
It’s clear that publishers are raising e-book prices to make print more appealing.
It is clear that the increase in technology is not slowing and that authors are wise to have both an eBook and paperback copy of their book. Not only does it look more professional but you have options on sells. I’ve made over $1,000 in one night at an event selling paperback copies of my books. In fact, I make more in one day selling paperbacks than I ever did in eBooks. That’s because book promotion should go beyond social media and when it does, you need to be ready for it. It’s a lot more professional to sell a paperback to someone face to face with a business card and bookmark than it is to tell them to go to amazon and buy the eBook. Who’s to say they will remember to do that when they get home? I for one cannot afford to depend on your memories people (smile).
It is what makes publishing fun to me, hard-copies. Just this week I had to deliver some packages to the UPS Store and made a connection with the Notary there. I found it refreshingly exciting to verbally discuss my book as opposed to writing about it which I do most of the time. I started to think about public speaking and how this plays a role in book publishing.
With paperbacks, Indie Authors have the opportunity to network almost anywhere. Heck, you can sell books out of the trunk of your car if you wanted to, and set up various events to which your book is the star. As much as you need an eBook version as well, you cannot sign an eBook. As much as we’d like to push it away in the background, paperbacks are making a comeback. Well, at least in my neck of the woods.
Speaking of which, I’ll be in San Antonio this weekend at The La Quinta Hotel on 850 Halm Boulevard by the airport. I’ll have copies of my books if any of you are in town. Just approach the front desk and ask for Yecheilyah. I’m in town on business from Friday to Sunday time permitting. In the meantime, I have dropped the Kindle price again and am extending the Amazon sale through Thursday. If you want to check out my writing for cheap, The Road to Freedom is available now for $0.99 until Thursday.
Let’s just be real for a moment shall we? There will always be times where you will feel inadequate. Times where you feel that your goals will always be too far to reach. Either your pockets are too thin or your faith just a few mustard seeds too small. In either event, we all have those moments were we second guess ourselves. Some people second guess their ability to be parents, some second guess that they are doing well at their jobs. Some of you even second guess your relationships. Will this last? Is it, is it real? That promotion? Maybe you second guess yourself there too. Is this really what I am supposed to be doing? Am I supposed to be here? These times are bad enough, I do not need to explain. You’ve lived life. You understand. You don’t need my explanation of how doubt creeps underneath our skins and try altering our minds. What you do need is reassurance that comparing your situation to others is like slamming your head into the desk to try and heal a headache. OK, so maybe that was a violent example but it’s exactly what we do when we play the compare game. When I look at where I am in my life, personally, professionally, or otherwise I see hope. But when I look at those who are where I am trying to go, personally or professionally, the colors don’t decorate the sky as much. And trust, I ain’t trying to reach for stars, but ain’t no rainbows either. We’ve all been here. The thing is, don’t compare. You can’t look at others to determine your growth because its yours. You’ve lived it and you’ve experienced it and unless someone somewhere know what its like to metamorph into someone else’s soul they can’t know what its like to walk in your shoes. Growth is the difference between who you are today and who you were yesterday. What can you see? It may not be a big rainbow people can see but I promise you there’s some lily’s and sunflowers down there some where, and some roses that grew from concrete. Always compare yourself up against yourself. Nothing more and nothing less. It’s the only way to win.
The PBS Blog 