Very helpful information for crafting realistic characters using emotional triggers.
Tag: life
The Layers of You
Every new level of your life will require a different version of you. Not a new version, just a different version. A version that was always there but that you were not ready or mature enough to see. A part that possibly, before now, you would not have understood.
Whenever you are going through something that seems unfair and difficult to cope with remember that another, perhaps much stronger, version of yourself is being unveiled and that process is not easy. It’s not easy because growth often requires pain or at the very least a certain level of discomfort. No one wanted to have pimples all over their face or have to deal with cramps, menstrual cycles (for women) or the emotional ups and downs of puberty but these changes were necessary as we transitioned from childhood to adulthood.
We are layers of an onion shedding one version of ourselves for another as we journey through life. I cannot now drink milk from a bottle. That version of me is gone. I cannot now sit on a rug in Kindergarten or at a desk in first grade and I cannot go back to High School. It is not even appropriate for me to go back to the past year, that version of me, these versions of me, are long gone. I must seek now an understanding of what this moment requires of me. This layer of me. This version of me.
These are the layers of you.
Yecheilyah (e-see-lee-yah) is an Author, Blogger, and Poet of nine published works including her soon-to-be released short inspirational guide “Keep Yourself Full.” Learn more by exploring Yecheilyah’s writing on this blog and her website at yecheilyahysrayl.com. Renaissance: The Nora White Story (Book One) is her latest novel and is available now on Amazon.com.
The PBS Blog Podcast – Ep 6 Be Gentle with Yourself
Today’s episode is about being patient and gentle with yourself. We already spoke about responsibility and discipline. If you set a goal and you didn’t meet that goal, don’t beat yourself over the head. We need time to grow physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually, and professionally in whatever we are doing. This is a process. It even takes time to heal. Give yourself that time. Don’t verbally abuse yourself and talk down to yourself. There are plenty of people in the world who will do that for you. Spare yourself the added abuse by being gentle with yourself.
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Episode 6 – Be Gentle with Yourself
The PBS Blog Podcast Ep 5 – Freedom and Responsibility
In today’s episode, we are talking about the responsibility end of freedom.
Freedom has been turned into a scapegoat that many of us have used to justify our beef with structure. Anything that requires us to act in a way that is disciplined, civil or logical we stray from under the guise of having the freedom to choose.
But choices are not without consequences.
We are adults and have long had the freedom to do as we choose. But as there’s a lot going on in the world today, we must remember that our actions and thoughts are not without a certain level of responsibility. Whether we are talking about writing and books or life in general, our freedom is not as free as it seems on the surface.
Today, I want to encourage you to be more disciplined in all areas of your life. More disciplined spiritually, mentally, and physically. Let’s take responsibility for the lives we live.
Don’t forget to subscribe for notification of future episodes.
Ep 5 – Freedom and Responsibility
5 Clues You are Stressing Out
It’s easy to say, “Don’t stress” but if we don’t understand how to put this into practice in our everyday life, this is a command that is not so easy to obey. That’s why I’ve been exercising practical ways not to stress so much (because there’s no such thing as not stressing…stressing is natural…we just overdo it).
Sometimes we don’t know we are stressing. This is not good because what you don’t recognize, you can’t change. No worries though, I got you covered.
Here are 5 Clues you’re stressing out:
Overthinking / Overanalyzing
One clue that you are stressed about something is if you can’t stop thinking about it. When you are going over a situation in your head repeatedly. You micromanage every possible scenario on how something can go wrong. You give it so much energy that you even have mental conversations with yourself on what could happen, what did happen, how it happened and even new ways it could have happened. You go to bed thinking about it and wake up thinking about it.
If this is you, you are stressing out and I am going to need you to chill.
Looking for Faults
If you find yourself looking for the flaw in things, you have a problem. Unlike being faced with a situation, you’re looking for one. Every single action is met with your own private investigation. The slightest issue is background checked for “possible” mistakes and mishaps. You even start to bring up old stuff, calculating how that situation and this one is connected.
If you’re constantly critiquing yourself or something/someone else, looking for problems that don’t nor have probably ever existed, you are stressing out and I am going to need you to just chill.
Whining / Complaining
What we think about will eventually come out of our mouths. If you find yourself complaining about every single itty bitty thing, you are stressed. You know that tone. When the inflation in your voice rises and the sentence begins with “but” or “why come” a whine is coming on. If all you focus on is problems you won’t see solutions. If you must complain all the time, you’re stressing yourself out and I am going to need you to chill.
Trying to Guess What People Are Thinking / Saying
This one is a lot more subtle than the others and is the cousin to overanalyzing. If you are having mental conversations about what you think other people are thinking and what they are saying, you are stressing. If you’re trying to find motive where it doesn’t exist, you are stressed because you’re worried about what others think and their reactions so you make up stuff. This is dangerous. Eventually, you will have convinced yourself you “know” what that person is thinking and start to interact with them based on the fictitious person in your head as if that’s who the person really is. You’ll start to look at everything they do based on the version of them in your head.
If you’re imagining what people must think or what they must be saying, you’re stressing and could push people away if your illusions ever reach the surface. Never assume you know what people are thinking. That’s what communication is for.
And oh yes, I am going to need you to chill.
Denial
It’s sometimes hard to see things about ourselves without someone pointing them out to us. This is when we need the help of family, friends, and people who truly care. You know, the ones who tell us exactly how it is… straight, no chaser. So, if someone says you’re stressed and your first response is to deny it or come up with excuses, that’s a big fat red flag that you probably are stressed out…
…and we’re going to need you to chill.
New Beginnings
What happens when the words
are carried on the backs of angels
and thread themselves like strings from your heart
to the edge of your fingertips
like consciousness translated into poetry
a spiritual essence poured out only to be confined
and restricted to the page that binds them
what happens when newness fills you to the brim
forcing you to walk into new beginnings
that this flesh has yet to verbalize properly
I have not the answers to these questions
not yet
just inklings of miracles
from black colored ink
and fire coated passion
on white paper.
Controlling the Energy Around You
As many of you know, I’ve been doing lots of personal reflection. My focus has been on healing and love. This included taking some extensive time off to spend with Yah, my family, embracing solitude and doing more writing.
In this process, I’ve learned a lot about myself (still learning), got to spend time with my mom, finished two books and moved to Georgia.
Long story short, this break has paid off in more ways than one and I want to share with you something I shared with my Bimonthly email list already. That is, learning to control the energy around you so that you’re more positive, have more energy, are happier and accomplishing more.
To start, I’ve been practicing this by training my mind to be more positive.
Positive Thoughts
Many are already talking about the power of positive thinking, but how does that look in action?
What I’ve come to understand about the power of thought is how much our thoughts contribute to our physical well-being.
We can literally control the energy around us by the quality of our thoughts.
This means that I cannot focus my thoughts on the negative all day, every day and expect to be happy and energetic. If you wake up complaining, go to work complaining, blog your complaints, Tweet and Facebook your complaints, how do you (realistically speaking) expect to have a good day?
This includes limiting what my ears hear and what my eyes see. I can think positively but thinking positive is not enough.
I must also eliminate negative people, places, and things from my life that influences the way that I think.
Why is this important? Because we cannot heal in the same environment that broke us.
I’ve found that watching and listening to what is less negatively stimulating can help me to think less negatively.
An example of this online is following more positive minded people on social media and accounts that encourage and build up instead of tear down. I removed those persons whose energy brought me down and followed those whose energy built me up. This doesn’t mean those I removed are bad people or that I love them less. It means that I love myself enough to protect my energy.
This process of falling back in love with ourselves begins with setting standards for what we will and will not tolerate. This is important because you teach people how to love you based on what you allow to take place.
Mental Rest
My break has been more so about mental rejuvenation more than physically. Being tired all the time does not necessarily mean that you’ve had a productive day. It may mean that you are busy but it doesn’t always mean that you’ve been productive. Sometimes it means it is mental rest that you need.
Because the spiritual (mind) and the physical (body) is connected, once we control the way we think we automatically control the way that we feel. Sure, I can get more hours of sleep (and I should) but…
ultimately it is my excitement and passion about the good in my life that will fill me up with positive and empowering energy.
Or, it is my depressed demeanor that will do the opposite.
Your mind can tire you out or fill you up.
For this, I am personally striving to cut down on complaining and worrying by focusing instead on positive thoughts and alternatives. This is not easy, is a daily process, and also means not allowing others to project their negative energy onto me. Giving into other people’s problems or letting people complain to us too much can drain our energy and leave us empty.
Being an ear is great but there’s a difference between being supportive and just letting people dump their issues in our laps.
We are not toilets and shouldn’t allow ourselves to be used.
Do not misunderstand me: Venting can be a good thing. Having someone to talk to is mentally healthy but in the words of Rudy Francisco:
“Some people will take until you have nothing left and then hold a grudge against your hands for being empty.”
Next, we’ll talk about some backlashes to the new and positive you and how to stay encouraged despite them. In a world this cold anything good is bound to be met with opposition. This should not surprise us. In fact, we should prepare for it.
The PBS Blog 