Category: Articles

Why Black Americans Empathize with Michael B Jordan’s Eric Killmonger over Boseman’s T’Challa

Photo: Marvel Studios

Because Eric Killmonger is a reflection of many Black American’s on a much deeper level than T’Challa. In fact, many Black American’s do not know T’Challa. They know Eric. This is why most Black Americans, more so than sympathize with him, empathize with him. They can put their lives into his shoes.

I’ve only seen the movie once (which is only important when talking about a movie nearing $900 million dollars worldwide and is #1 in the World…the world ya’ll…that people have seen two and three times.)

Saying this, I have only read two articles that brought up the real concerning the conflict between T’Challa and Killmonger (cited below). I liked that they put this conflict  in the movie because (as I believe one of the actors pointed out) there is a private conversation among Black Americans concerning the relationship between those who have been taken captive and those who have not. As I’ve stated on this blog time and time again, Africa is a continent with over 50 countries and even more nationalities of people. That said it’s impossible for a people to be called African as nationality because it does not specifically point to a place of origin. Which country in Africa are we talking about? Where in Africa can you claim? Who in Africa would claim you? Herein lies the conflict between Eric and T’Challa.

Here’s the phrase that has captured our hearts:

Bury Me
Movie Quote: Eric Killmonger

Killmonger was left behind, left out and rejected from among his people. He was locked out of the greatness of Wakanda and forced to grow up in the gritty streets of Oakland. His struggle and longing for a place of belonging and nationhood is the exact sentiment of the Black American. This statement (“…bury me in the ocean with my ancestors that jumped from the ships…”) is proof that he is a descendant of those who have been taken captive via The Transatlantic Slave Trade; a Wakandian by blood but rejected. Not privy to the knowledge and advancement of his homeland, Killmonger attended instead American Universities and studied his culture from a distance. Having grown up in America, not even Killmonger’s name is a reflection of his identity. His name is Eric which is not as exotic as T’Challa. It does not signify or denote any kind of place of origin. Eric also does not speak with an accent and uses language common to any Black American male growing up in the hood.

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Eric is angry but rightfully so. He has had to watch his people suffer while Wakanda has thrived with resources that could have helped them. Eric wears his rage concerning the mistreatment of his people like a garment and does not understand how to direct that energy in a way that is less destructive. He reminds me of the young black men standing on the corners, full of rage, but without a way to release it in a way that is productive. Given the proper guidance, education, and resources, I believe these are some of the most powerful men the so-called Black community has. While many of us drive by them, shaking our heads and sighing, these boys are absolutely fearless and, like I said, given the proper direction can be the warriors they are descendant from.

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While Killmonger’s temper gets the best of him, his desire to use the wealth of Wakanda as a way to help his people in America is a noble one (just don’t weaponize the vibranium by putting it into the hands of black people with no training in how to use it Killmonger. Train your people first lol.) For all of these reasons, and many more, I believe many Black Americans empathize and connect more so with Michael B. Jordan’s character than Boseman’s T’Challa. For many of us, Killmonger is the hero, choosing to die (symbolically and literally) with his people than to serve among those who have rejected him.

The first article I want to share is: “Are Black Americans Allowed in Wakanda?”

“Every time a Wakandan referred to Killmonger in the film, he was called an “outsider.” Even though he proved he was of Wakandan blood, he still wasn’t one of them. Killmonger grew up hearing stories about a home he’d never been to. He had knowledge of Wakanda’s wealth and culture but he had no access to it himself. While T’Challa was able to visit a lush, African landscape surrounded by his ancestors, Killmonger’s trip to his own ancestral plane led him back to an apartment complex, where he was mostly alone.”

Read more Here: https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/opinion-doggett-wakanda-racism_us_5a901b35e4b01e9e56baef3e

The second one is: Erik Killmonger Is Not A ‘Super-Villain,’ He Is A Super-Victim Of Systemic Oppression

“I refuse to see Killmonger as a super-villain. I see him as a super-victim of systemically oppressive forces, forces that forced him into a hyper-awareness of his dueled unwanted status in Wakanda and in America, due to having the blood of his mother, who was a descendant of black folks forced into the United States via the Trans Atlantic Slave Trade. This two-pronged othering serves as the source of his super-power. His super-power did not derive from radioactive spider bites like Spider Man, or mythological alien strength like that of Superman. Killmonger’s character harbors a super-power more potent than the fictive mineral Vibranium, housed exclusively in Wakanda: Killmonger is the possessor of un-tempered black rage….Killmonger’s black rage is my black reality, and I cannot see Erik Killmonger Stevens as a villain because it would mean seeing myself as a villain as well (and as a black man in America, I have been vilified enough.)

Read more Here: https://blavity.com/eric-killmonger-is-not-a-super-villain-he-is-a-super-victim-of-systemic-oppression

T’Challa and Huey next to Yoruba Tribal ruler in West Nigeria sitting on throne surrounded by elephant tusks.

Personally, I liked both T’Challa and Killmonger for different reasons and enjoyed the Martin Luther King Jr. and Malcolm X undertones embodied in the characters. Marvel’s Black Panther came out around the same time Huey Newton and Bobby Seale founded The Black Panther Party for Self-Defense and it is believed that X-Men is based on The Civil Rights Movement. Created in 1963, fans allege that Stan Lee wanted to create a comic that showed bigotry and racism via fantasy and that Magneto and Professor X are direct correlations of Martin and Malcolm. In Black Panther, T’Challa and Killmonger also seem to have the same correlation. Those who were fans of Malcolm will definitely be a fan of Killmonger.

Furthermore, prior to Stan Lee’s comic and the organizing of The Black Panther Party, the term “Black Panther” existed already. The 761st Tank Battalion was an independent tank battalion of the United States Army during World War II. The 761st was made up primarily of African-American soldiers, who by federal law were not permitted to serve alongside white troops. They were known as the “Black Panthers” after their unit’s distinctive insignia; their motto was “Come out fighting.”

Now, go watch the movie!!

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Detach Yourself from Bad Vibes: Don’t make other people’s energy yours

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Photo by Braden Collum on Unsplash

When running your race and trying to build something it’s most important to block out any and all negative vibes (from others and from your own self-doubt). One of the obvious reasons for this is because you can easily become distracted and lose focus. But, going deeper, you lose focus because you begin to lock into other people’s energy. Whatever the negative minded people around you are feeling, you begin to feel it too. They don’t have to necessarily be bad people but the energy they are giving off can be bad. If you are always surrounded around these kinds of people, their energy can become your energy.

People emit all kinds of energies and some are not even aware that the vibes they are giving off are destructive. People who are not aware of their own destruction are dangerous people because it means they tear down everything around them. As you can see, that makes it difficult to build with these people. You cannot build with a destructive person. You will need to remove yourself from that person’s presence and free yourself from the ways in which their thoughts become your thoughts.

When we take on the negative energies of others we soon begin to:

  • Doubt ourselves. “I shouldn’t have done that.”
  • Create mental notes on why said thing might not work
  • Make excuses for why we shouldn’t move forward with said thing
  • Reject opportunities (because, you know, said person said it wouldn’t be good)

When we do this, lock into someone’s energy, we take our eyes off the prize and start to come up with our own reasons and assumptions which are probably a far cry from the truth. That said, when trying to do something, write a book, build a business, it’s very important not to take on the emotions and feelings of the people around you if those emotions and feelings aren’t uplifting and productive to what you are trying to achieve. This is why it is advised to keep things to yourself because people tend to reject what they do not understand and will begin to project that energy onto you. Even if you have to walk alone, this is sometimes necessary because no one else may get your vision. That doesn’t mean your vision is wrong or that you are wrong. It just means that the vision was given to YOU which mean it’s not for everyone to understand right now. It’s for YOU to understand and to carry it through.

People will pick out the pieces of you they like and understand. That’s life. Everyone does not like you and you shouldn’t expect them to. Expect to be misunderstood by some. Hated by some and looked down upon by some. Underestimated by some. Expect it because that’s real and that’s life. Your job is to love yourself regardless to INCLUDE the parts of you that others reject. Personally, not worrying about what people think (negatively) has been a game changer for me. My stress levels are lower and I find myself being much more productive.

The truth is that I know what I have been commanded to do and what I bring to the table behind the scene. I am secure in that and being secure in this is a daily practice of constant focus and a whole lot of ignoring! (You gotta learn to ignore people for a little bit sometimes and focus on you.) In this, I can block out all energy that is not conducive to what I am trying to do and where I am trying to go. I can turn my back on it without regret and without apology. I can be who I was purposed to be without being held back by other people’s negative opinions, thoughts, and limitations. I can be free. And so can you.

This is Why Understanding History is Important

It is important not to get emotional about it. I am just going to discuss the facts. Let’s just be real for one second here people.  If they won’t even show you that the Egyptians were a BLACK SKINNED people, why would anyone admit the Israelites were black? (Who were often mistaken as Egyptians…also Israel is in Northeast Africa by the way.)

I am sure we’ve all heard it by now. It’s all over social media. In the midst of Black History Month The Today’s Show decided to showcase an image of a white Nefertiti. Not only am I not surprised, but I think maybe we (so-called Black people) deserve it. Maybe this is what it takes for us to wake up and stay woke. Maybe these are the kinds of shockers that is necessary for us to realize the truth.  You don’t have to know much about history to know that the Egyptians were a black skinned people. “Egypt is in Africa, not some small island in Sweden.” (Paul Mooney)

The word Ham in Hebrew is Khwam, and it means “hot, burnt, and black.” The first-born son of Ham, Cush, forms the Kushite nation. They were also called and known as the ancient Ethiopians. Ethiopia comes from the Greek word, Aethipos, which means, “burnt or black face.”  The Greeks applied this name to the people living south of Egypt. The name Egypt comes from the word Aegyptus though the Egyptians called themselves Khemet / Kemet, which is a variation of the Hebrew word Khawm (Ham).  It means, “People of the black land.”

Gerald Massey, English writer and author of the book, Egypt the Light of the World, wrote, “The dignity is so ancient that the insignia of the Pharaoh evidently belonged to the time when Egyptians wore nothing but the girdle of the Negro” (p. 251)

Sir Richard Francis Burton, a 19th century English explorer, writer, and linguist in 1883 wrote to Gerald Massey, “You are quite right about the ‘AFRICAN’ origin of the Egyptians.  I have 100 human skulls to prove it.”

King Tut
King Tut

Scientist, R. T. Prittchett, states in his book, The Natural History of Man, “In their complex and many of the complexions and in physical peculiarities the Egyptians were an ‘AFRICAN’ race” (p. 124-125).

The ancient Greek historian, Herodotus, who visited Egypt in the 5th century B.C.E., saw the Egyptians face to face and described them as black-skinned with woolly hair.

Anthropologist, Count Constatin de Volney (1727-1820), spoke about the Egyptians that produced the Pharaohs.  He later paid tribute to Herodotus’ discovery when he said:

“The ancient Egyptians were true Negroes of the same type as all native born Africans.  That being so, we can see how their blood, mixed for several centuries with that of the Romans and Greeks, must have lost the intensity of its original color, while retaining nonetheless the imprint of its original mold.  We can even state as a general principle that the face (referring to The Sphinx) is a kind of monument able, in many cases, to attest to or shed light on historical evidence on the origins of the people.”

Volney also stated:

“What a subject for meditation.  Just think that the race of black men today, our slaves and the object of our scorn, is the very race to which we owe our arts, science, and even the use of our speech.”

  • Egypt: Ham’s second born son < Blood brothers to the Ethiopians
  • Ethiopian > Burnt Face
  • Egypt > Burnt Black
  • Phut: The Somalians – According to the ancient record of Egypt, Phut has been traced back to the Somalian

“Every man has flesh and blood, which includes a skin tone, but the Israelites and Egyptians were black, I’m just making it known.”

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From Music Video: Remember the Time by Michael Jackson

On Healing

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Wow. I miss you guys! Feel like I’ve been gone foreeverrr.

Briefly, I’ve been, admittedly, in a funk. Not all of the time. Being away from social media has definitely been productive for sure work wise. But personally, it’s like this year arrived and I suddenly felt extremely down, lonely and secretly, I wanted someone to reach out to me. I wanted to laugh and talk and hang out. I wanted to confide in someone who would understand and I needed a friend. I was listening to sad songs and everything yall. I mean, “Who can I run to when I need love?” Lol.

As I posted to my IG though, replacing “Why is this happening to me?” with “What is this trying to tell me?” has been a game changer. It’s not like just posting quotes but it is something I’ve actually had to think about and speak and literally put into practice. I had to literally stand there and say, “OK EC. See the purpose, see the purpose.” Only when I did this did I begin to regain my strength and not sweat the small stuff.  And because I don’t believe in being this vulnerable publicly unless I have something to share that I learned, I decided to keep silent. Only now that I feel better could I blog about it because I have something to share that I hope will help you as much as it has helped me so here goes:

On Letting Go

Letting go is a process that was never intended for us to do all at once. Even when we have to cut people out of our lives we still hold them in our hearts. It is only little by little that we release them until they are no longer occupying the space in our minds and taking up our energy. So, if you are feeling somewhat discouraged because you are not completely healed I want you to know that you have not failed. You don’t have to get over it in one day because it’s not that simple. Just take it one day at a time. It’s not normal to slice off your arm or your legs and not feel pain. You’ve parted with something that was not just a part of you but that helped the rest of your body to function. To not bleed after this is not to be alive and you are not a zombie. You are human. And as human’s we cannot help but feel.

“Those mountains you are carrying you were only supposed to climb.”

– Najwa Zebian

Now that I am feeling better, I’ve decided my focus this year is on HEALING. Healing spiritually, physically, mentally, emotionally and psychologically, all areas. I no longer have the energy for negative vibes and I won’t fret the small stuff. New beginnings are here and NEW LEVELS are arriving. In short, my focus is on VIBRATING HIGHER and speaking POWER over my life. Some things I’ll be striving to implement:

  • Surround myself with those who want to be in my life without worrying about those who don’t want to be in my life. There will ALWAYS be those who are offended by your evolution. How do you respond? Keep growing.
  • Only use words that will help me to grow: I CAN. I WILL. I AM. I MUST. This is powerful, uplifting and empowering language. The more I infuse these words into my language and into my life, the more I take back control of how I feel.
  • Forgiveness is a personal revolution and breathtakingly liberating when implemented into our lives (because it is connected to love.) My first step in strengthening my levels of forgiveness is learning to forgive myself.
  • If people want to leave, I will peacefully let them go without feeling guilty. This means that if I reach out and I don’t feel it is warranted, I will pull back without fighting the vibe. I am not going to push if I feel my gesture isn’t wanted. People don’t have to tell us how they’re feeling, we can feel it if we’re paying attention. I am not talking metaphorically but for real feel it. In our body, in our hearts, and in our souls. And then, when you are no longer held captive to the opinions of men or scratching against the cage of their judgment, that is when you set yourself free.
This year it is all about my healing and everyone else who is willing to come along with me. No, this is NOT just about me! This is about you too. Self-love is a journey and road trips are always better with more people!

We CAN heal. We WILL heal. We MUST heal. We ARE healing.

“It’s not what you look at that matters, it’s what you see.”
– Henry David Thoreau
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The Ancient Origins of Modern Holidays

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I don’t celebrate Holidays but rarely do I go into why. I thought this would be a good time to do that.

To put it simply, I believe in putting no gods or deities before the one Almighty Creator, Yah. Holidays are a contradiction to this as they each go back to the worship of a god/goddess. 

For clarity, I do celebrate my birthday. I do not consider it a holiday in the same way as these holidays. 

New Year’s Day – The Babylonian God Akitu, Roman Goddess Janus

In Egypt, the year coincided with the rising of the star Sirius, the Phoenicians and Persians began their new year with the spring equinox, and the Greeks celebrated it on the winter solstice. For the Babylonians of ancient Mesopotamia, the first new moon following the vernal equinox—the day in late March with an equal amount of sunlight and darkness—signaled the start of a new year and represented the rebirth of the natural world.

They marked the occasion with a massive religious festival called Akitu, derived from the Sumerian word for barley, which they cut in the spring. This practice involved a different ritual on each of its 11 days. During the Akitu, statues of the gods were paraded through the city streets, and rites were enacted to symbolize their victory over the forces of chaos. Through these rituals, the Babylonians believed the world was symbolically cleansed and recreated by the gods in preparation for the New Year and the return of spring.

Later, Julius Caesar instituted January 1st as the first day of the year, partly to honor the month’s namesake Janus, the Roman god of change and beginnings. His two faces allowed him to look back into the past and forward into the future. This idea became tied to the concept of transition from one year to the next.

Valentine’s Day –Lupercalia, Februata, God of Fertility

Originally celebrated on February 15, Valentine’s Day comes from Lupercalia, the “festival of sexual license,” and was held by the ancient Romans in honor of Lupercus, god of fertility. Clothed in loincloths made from sacrificed goats and smeared in their blood, the Luperci would run about Rome, striking women with februa, thongs made from skins of the sacrificed goats. The Luperci believed that the floggings purified women and guaranteed their fertility and ease of childbirth. February derives from februa or “means of purification.”

February was also sacred to Juno Februata, the goddess of “fever of love” and women and marriage to the Romans. On February 14, small pieces of paper, each of which had the name of a teenage girl written on it, were put into a container. Teenage boys would then choose one piece of paper at random. The boy and the girl whose name was drawn would become a “couple,” joining in erotic games at feasts and parties celebrated throughout Rome. After the festival, they would remain sexual partners for the rest of the year. This custom was observed in the Roman Empire for centuries.

Easter- Ishtar, Aphrodite, Venus, Goddess of War and Sexual Love

Rabbits and eggs have nothing to do with the resurrection of “Christ” but have long been part of spring celebrations as symbols of new life and fertility. The wreath-circles are symbols of the womb, for example.

The Sumerian goddess Inanna is known by her Babylonian name, “Ishtar.” In ancient Canaan, Ishtar was known as Astarte. Her counterparts in the Greek and Roman pantheons are known as Aphrodite and Venus. She is the goddess of war and sexual love. Her cult practiced sacred prostitution or temple prostitution, where women waited at a temple to have sex with the gods. The word Easter does not appear to be derived from Ishtar. This is a common misunderstanding. Easter is from the German Eostre, the goddess of the dawn—a bringer of light. Ishtar and Easter seem to be homophones: they may be pronounced similarly but have different meanings.

Easter is the celebration of Ishtar, the Assyrian and Babylonian goddess of fertility and sex. Her symbols (like the egg and bunny) were and still are fertility and sex symbols today.

Halloween – Samhain (pronounced /ˈsɑːwɪn/ SAH-win, sounds like Halloween), Lord of Darkness

Halloween kicks off the start of some of the world’s major Holidays, and it is the time of the year where heavy witchcraft takes place. In fact, from October 31st through November 1st, this is known as the Witches New Year in some pagan circles. The Celts believed the dead could walk among the living during this time and that during Samhain, the living could visit with the dead. This is why people dress up in costumes. They are representing the dead who, on this night, walk the Earth and visit the living. You could see a modern example of this in the last season of American Horror Story, where the dead people in the house are free to walk the Earth on Halloween.

According to the book “Halloween—An American Holiday, An American History,” some of the Celts wore ghoulish costumes so that wandering spirits would mistake them for one of their own and leave them alone. Others offered sweets to the spirits to appease them. In medieval Europe, the Catholic clergy adopted local pagan customs. They had their adherents go from house to house wearing costumes and requesting small gifts.

Though some would say that Samhain and Halloween are two separate Holidays, they are not. Today, the only difference is that one is ancient paganism (the maintaining of old pagan practices and traditions). The other is Neo (new) paganism, incorporating a more “happy” appearance to seem nice. However, it is the honoring of the same deity.

Thanksgiving – Ceres, Goddess of Harvest, Grain, Crops

We are taught that the first Thanksgiving was celebrated by the Pilgrims after their first harvest in the New World in October 1621. We are also taught that the real Thanksgiving involved the slaughter of the Natives and the stealing of their land. Both of these accounts are not entirely true.

Yes, the Natives were slaughtered, and their conquerors hosted a feast to celebrate their demise. And yes, I would agree that celebrating Thanksgiving could be seen as disrespecting the Natives whose land was stolen and families killed.

At the same time, the celebration of what we now call Thanksgiving took place many centuries before Christopher Columbus.

Like the other Holidays, what we call Thanksgiving goes back to worshiping the gods and goddesses. Specifically, this Holiday marks the worship of Ceres, Goddess of Harvest though she has many names. (Ceres is where we get the word Cereal.) When the pagans had a good season, they thanked their gods/goddesses for their bountiful Harvest.

Ceres was a goddess of agriculture, grain crops, fertility, and motherly relationships in ancient Rome. Initially, she was the central deity in Rome’s plebeian or Aventine Triad, then was paired with her daughter Proserpina in what Romans described as “the Greek rites of Ceres.” Her seven-day April festival of Cerealia included the popular Ceres games.

“The Egyptian’s fall festival was centered around the worship of Min. The Babylonian’s fall festival was centered around the worship of Marduk. The Persian’s fall festival was centered around the worship of Mithras. The Chinese’s fall festival was centered around the worship of Chung Ch’ui. The Greek’s fall festival was centered around the worship of Demeter. And the Roman’s fall festival was centered around the worship of Ceres.” (Maurice Lindsay, November 27, 2017)

“The turkey was associated with abundance and being thankful.  Some tribes viewed the bird as a sacred symbol of abundance and fertility, one which would serve as the sacrificial guest of honor in various ceremonies.”

– https://www.thegypsythread.org/thanksgiving-pagan-roots-secret-symbols/

Christmas – Saturn, the Sun God and The Winter Solstice

Christmas, too is an ancient pagan practice and has nothing to do with the biblical Messiah. According to the book The Bible as History, December 25th is referred to in documents as Christmas Day in A.D. 324 for the first time. Under the Roman emperor Justinian, it was recognized as an official holiday. An old Roman festival played a significant part in the choice of this particular day. December 25th in ancient Rome was the ‘Dies Natali Invictus,’ ‘the birthday of the unconquered,’ (Sun), the day of the winter solstice, and at the same time, in Rome, the last day of the Saturnalia.

In a book by historian Jack Finegan, Myth & Mystery: An Introduction to the Pagan Religions of the Biblical World, “the worship of the sun-god continued widely throughout the empire, and under Aurelian (A.D. 270-275), the cult was restored to its former high estate. In the year 274, Aurelian declared the god – now called Deus Sol Invictus – the official deity of the Roman Empire. He built a temple of the sun in Rome and set the sun’s birthday celebration (naturalis solis invicti) on December 25TH, the date then accepted for the winter solstice (also in his solar character, the birthday of Mithras.)

“In the time of Constantine, the cult of Deus Sol Invictus was still at its height, and the portrait of the sun-god was on the coins of Constantine….Likewise, it must have been in this time and with the intent to transform the significance of an existing sacred date that the birthday of Jesus, which had been celebrated in the East on January 6… was placed in Rome on December 25, the date of the birthday celebration of Sol Invictus. This date appears in a list of dates probably compiled in A.D. 336 and published in the Roman city calendar, edited by Filocalus, for the year 354 (Finegan, p. 211-212)”.

Christmas is the celebration of the sun, not the son. It commemorates the Winter Solstice (the shortest period of daylight and the longest night of the year), which begins December 21st, honoring the Sun God Saturn. The festival of Saturnalia was the festival held to exchange gifts, party, and worship. Finegan mentions January 6th, but this is also a pagan Holiday. It is called Epiphany. The truth is no one knows precisely when Yahoshua was born.

When Constantine became Emperor of Rome, he fused ancient pagan practices with the Bible to unite the pagan world. As a Pagan High Priest himself, he sought to reconcile and blend pagan practices with Christian beliefs to merge paganism with the Roman church. This included sometimes killing off pagans in the process who refused to accept the Christianizing of their gods/goddesses.

Sources:

The Bible as History

http://www1.cbn.com/the-pagan-roots-of-halloween

The Pagan & Genocidal Roots Of “Thanksgiving”

https://www.huffingtonpost.com/richard-schiffman/the-thanksgiving-truth_b_1105181.html

Myth & Mystery: An Introduction to the Pagan Religions of the Biblical World

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Thanksgiving_(United_States)

https://list25.com/25-popular-holidays-with-surprisingly-pagan-origins/

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Winter_solstice

http://www.history.com/topics/valentines-day/history-of-valentines-day

Halloween—An American Holiday, An American History

https://rcg.org/articles/ttbsvd.html

12 Life Lessons I Learned in 2017

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  • Growth is painful, uncomfortable, and frustrating. It reveals the raw and aching part of us and demands our masks to fall so that we may accept who we truly are and what truly is. This is unpleasant and frightening but necessary because, without this kind of mental and physical suffering, we cannot grow.

 

  • Deceit lies, and lack of proper communication can destroy any relationship. It doesn’t matter how long you’ve known a person, how many secrets you’ve shared, how many deep conversations you’ve engaged in or how many tears you’ve shed, deception is a rotten fruit that contaminates weak foundations. No matter how embarrassing or silly, be upfront with the people you say that you love.

 

  • There is, sadly, a thing as being too nice. Energy is precious and we cannot risk being vulnerable to the first smile or positive comment that is thrown in our direction. Not in this world. While we can be positive examples, we must also accept that for some people it’s too late. They have been too far corrupted and will only trample our kindness and gossip about our weaknesses. Like the saying says, “Not everyone deserves a seat at the table of your life.” Discernment is key.

 

  • Let go of people who have let go of you. Do this without feeling ashamed, embarrassed or like you’ve done something wrong. Let go courageously. Without the need to explain yourself or to apologize for being misunderstood. People who have lied and betrayed you and left you out to rot will always make it seem that you are the person who is possessed and that you are the one who has done wrong. These are lies. In the words of Najwa Zebian, “shame lies on the person who takes advantage of a good heart.”

 

  • Laugh often and cry when necessary. Scream if you have to. Do not be ashamed. This is healing. Let the tears cleanse you.

 

  • It’s OK to be hurt, we’ve all been at some point, but don’t play the victim. Self-victimization paralyzes so that we have an excuse not to take responsibility for the lives that we live. We are always looking back on childhood, on past relationships and on failed circumstances as a crutch for why we are not the people we know that we should be. In the words of Pierre Jeanty, “When are you going to stop complaining about who you are now, because of who they were to you? You speak as an activist, yet live as a slave without a voice.” The past is our lesson. It is not our cage.

 

  • Do not work so hard to prove your sincerity. It will only come across as fake. There will always be people who do not accept you and to them, it does not matter how hard you try, you will never be enough. Forcing these people to understand you will do more harm than good. Don’t overdo it. Just be you.

 

  • Stop misinterpreting silence for whatever your imagination has made up. You don’t know what’s going on in people’s lives, why they have chosen not to respond or what circumstance held them up. Sometimes silence means people aren’t interested and that they don’t care but not all the time (though our doubt would have us to believe so.) Other times, silence means they don’t know how to respond or have not gotten around to it yet. Stop stressing over made-up mental scenarios.

 

  • Do not force locked doors to open. Sometimes it is just not the right time. If you break the door down, it will never be the same again. Remember the butterfly: If you force it out of its cocoon, it will never fly. It is not that this isn’t your door, it’s just not your time.

 

  • Do your own research and try things out for yourself. Experiment so that you know intimately what works and what does not work. Take risks and see what is legit and what is fabricated for yourself. Do this and you will not bend to every new opinion that surfaces.

 

  • Follow your own advice and show yourself the same love you so desperately seek from others. Give it to yourself first and then pour into the cups of those whose hearts are worthy. You are special so not everyone can receive what you have to give. Your love is not a game. Your love is a gift. Give it that distinction.

 

  • Never sacrifice your personal integrity for the sake of being “liked”. Don’t let people censor and edit your voice. If it doesn’t feel right, it’s not right. Walk away. Turn down whatever does not feel and taste and smell, like you.

Indie Authors: Stop Giving Away Your Books for Free – Angela Ford

Check out this article by Angela Ford on giving away your books for free. I’ve never been comfortable giving away my books except to my ARC / Beta Readers so I find her perspective interesting. I would love to hear other’s opinion on it though and to be provided with more resources to support the article. The comment left on the post poses a good question too.

What about you? Do you think authors should give their books away for free? Why or why not?

“In the indie author community, there’s a false mindset you have to give your books away for free before people will be willing to purchase them. If the first book in your series is free, someone will pay $0.99, $2.99 and even $5.99 for your full priced books. In truth, I’ve been seeing the opposite effect and heard from indie authors who have had the same experience. Here are some examples…”

Click through to the ORIGINAL post HERE