On Friday I mentioned I rest on Saturday’s. Turns out I was late in discovering there are no prompts on Saturday and Sunday! LOL. So this is totally awesome. It gives us all a time to rest and readers a chance to catch up. So my custom will be to present for you a weekly wrap-up of links to all of my assignments for the week on Sunday before the new week begins. Please find below my posts for this year’s Writing 101 course so far:
Assignment #3: One Word Inspiration
Were all adults here. That said this post is not for children. I’m an adult and if you’re under age I would suggest you stop reading.
There, now that the children have left the room let’s get into it.
First, I have to say I’m not as anti-romance as you’d think. I actually enjoy romance….to an extent. I’m just not the exclusive romance type. You know, the books with the man on the front sporting a six-pack, low cut jeans that makes it obvious he’s not wearing underwear, a cow-boy hat and “come and get it” eyes. That’s just not sexy to me; perhaps because I don’t really see it as being manly enough. I mean sure, I see your oiled down abs but I’m just not impressed. I’m more interested in Romance that incorporates more into the story; romantic adventure or urban fiction if you will where the story is not exclusively about Mary Jane and the six-pack, which brings me back to my purpose of this post: Sex Scenes: Romance, Erotica, and Urban Fiction.
Dear Indie Erotica, Romance, Urban Fiction Writers,
Don’t overdo the sex. Just because you can mention every body part known to man doesn’t mean that you should. Even when it comes to love scenes, readers should feel sexy, aroused even, but not grossed out. Some books I can’t even get through because there’s no emotion behind the action. The character keeps it real and all but that’s not, in my opinion, enough to be enticing. There are some authors who can paint their sex scenes very well and for that I must say that my opinions are from a readers perspective since I don’t actually write erotica. That said, I am not placing judgment, I’m just saying that if your going to write about couples making love put some tact to it. You can mention body parts without being outright vulgar. Now days I just feel like I’m watching a really bad porno movie. Thing is, you can be nasty if you want (were all adults here) but there’s even a way to do that. The idea is to draw us in. Make us feel like we’re in the moment. Make it just as sensual and as intimate as you would if you were actually having sex. Tracy Brown actually writes very good Urban Fiction novels with some steamy scenes. She’s not an Indie Author but she’s a good example of how it should be done. Her books also have other themes incorporated so that its not straight sex (that gets boring after-while, there must be an actual story line people). White Lines for instance is a book about a woman and drug addiction and is a pretty good read. I have a few of her books in fact.
Now, about stories surrounding abuse…
Stories about physical abuse are going to be difficult despite how you look at it. There is no way to write physical abuse stories that are reflective of the truth and make people any less uncomfortable. I still believe, however, that there should be some skill involved. When people are physically abused its not just physical its emotional. This should be incorporated in. As you walk us through the incident, there must be a simultaneous emotional / mental explosion along with what’s happening physically. There is a way to show me the physical and the emotional pain experienced by the character without bluntly stating that he forced his you know what into her you know where. This shows me a glimpse of the abuse and shocks me, but it would be better if the feeling was shown instead of told. The classic: “show me, don’t tell me”:
I’m not that kind of writer so what you’ve read probably sucked but the point is that books that include sex period requires some kind of skill. Erotica and Urban Fiction are not genres that give us the right to just blurt stuff out. It’s like I tell my husband all the time when it comes to comedy: “A whole bunch of curse words and vulgar language does not necessarily make it funny”. Too often comedians feel like they have to use such language just to make people laugh and it causes them not to be funny at all in my opinion. You don’t have to be nasty to be funny. The same thing applies to writing, it can be real and genuine without overdoing the sex scenes.
I just have to say I’m excited to be participating in Blogging U this year. I feel like I’m going back to school LOL. This will give me the chance to produce at least one post a day while sharpening my writing skills simultaneously. I am also looking forward to meeting new bloggers via The Commons.
So here’s how the postings will go: I will be taking the Writing 101 course for the next four weeks. That said, I will produce at least one post a day that will have something to do with our theme for the day in addition to my regular postings throughout the week (so my Writers Quote Wednesdays and other regular posts will still go out). I’m not sure if the prompts go out on weekends but I will continue to have Saturdays off so you can expect no postings on the prompt then. Otherwise, I will continue to annoy* your emails with my many random postings in addition to whatever blogging prompt we are given from Writing 101! OK, that exclamation mark was really unnecessary, I’m not that excited. It’s just that, well, The Walking Dead is about to come on.
*Note: Seriously, I hope I’m not that annoying, but if I am, always remember that you control how many emails, if any, you receive from blogs you follow. Just adjust your settings to where they accompany your toleration levels.
Who I am today would melt away like falling snowflakes during freezing winters upon meeting the ground, for I would tear down the foundations to everything that built me. I would go back to change everything that makes me strong today. Arrogantly and ignorantly, I would rearrange days to fit my own endeavors; whatever pleases me that I will do. And those who’ve caused me pain I would exact vengeance. I would avoid hurt as if running from a plague, and strategically erase all traces of my own crime scene. Indeed, if I could build a time machine, I would fill my life with days of sunlight and sorrow would be a stranger to me. Childhood, Adulthood— I doubt if I would know the difference, for innocence and naiveté would cover me like fine linen. As such, my shoulders would not know what it’s like to bear heavy loads. My smooth skin would easily chip away at the sight of danger, my mind would know nothing of sacrifice, and in times of distress I would flood my bed with tears. They would fall dangerously from my eyelids like liquid apologies for not knowing the zip, slither, snap, and thump of a broken heart; for not understanding the crackling crunch of a spirit defeated; for pulling back the wounds of wisdom only to create outlines of invisibility, for I would cease to exist.
Don’t try to build time machines to go back to relive mistakes. Everything you are and everything you’ve endured is what makes you who you are today, flaws and all. That said, never linger on old wounds so much that you wish to go back. What is done is done. Meanwhile, the future has plenty of room for change. Embrace it.
As I am accustomed to doing, if I can’t find a re-blog button for your article and I really enjoyed it I’ll share it the old school way: Link up.
So anyway I found this article on Twitter (after promptly following Elena) and I really love what she has to say about what bloggers need to stop worrying about. To her credit I am only going to except a few key points. Please visit her blog for the entire article.
Google/Alexa Ranking
I am no expert and unless you are on this topic or you can afford to pay someone to handle website optimization, you need to stop worrying about your ranking. I am not saying that you shouldn’t use Yoast, add keywords and complete alt tags on your pics. However, I find the excessive obsession with ranking a complete waste of time. I do what I need to do when I create a post and then I step away.
EC – Psst: (This is a good point. Good thing I don’t even know what Alexa Ranking is or Yoast for that matter lol)
Number of Followers
And by this I mean on your blog and all of your social media. I know a lot of people look at my accounts and see that I don’t always follow back. That is because I refuse to get on the follow me and I will follow your back train. You must understand that on some platforms, particularly FaceBook, having a huge number of followers that never look at your page actually hurts you. I personally have seen accounts with thousands of followers and no retweets, no likes and no pins. How did their huge following help them? In reality, not at all.
Automatic follow threads and follow backs do not necessarily bring you more traffic and can be a huge waste of your limited time. If it doesn’t work for you, stop.
Reciprocation
I am here to tell you that you don’t have to read, comment, like, tweet back, pin etc. to absolutely everyone that has been nice enough to do that for you. Unless you have figured out time travel or your days have more than 24 hours, you will never be able to keep that up forever.
Conversely, you need to stop obsessing with keeping track of which bloggers you have done the above for. Be understanding. Maybe that blogger that didn’t read or comment back on your post isn’t interested in your topic or maybe they have a niche of bloggers that they are already committed to sharing with. Don’t keep a scorecard.
This post was prompted by a friend who contacted me because she needed help writing a resume. Before I started fiction writing full time, which I am really only able to do financially because of my husband’s financial support and our collective investment, I was an administrative specialist at a community center. One of my primary duties included helping people to write resumes, complete job applications, mock interviews, and basically the overall job search campaign which included sometimes adult tutoring, especially in the area of computers.
The increase in technology has changed the way that we view everything. From book publishing, printing, and even resume writing. Thing is, you don’t have to do so much writing anymore. What happens now is that your resume will go through a screening process by a computer, which looks up Keywords as it relates to that particular market. If your resume “passes”, that is to say those keywords were found, it will move on to the recruiters’ desk. If your resume “fails” however, it will not even be seen by the employer. Sounds unfair I know but that’s the world we live in.
To make matters easy, you really only need a few sections and minimal writing skills to build a presentable resume:
• Objective OR Professional Profile
• Career History
• Educational Background
• Skills
You can add references as well but that’s even becoming extinct in the area of most importance on a resume (most places want your references during the interview or post resume process). What’s the most important bullet point here? It’s not your educational background, not even your employment history. These days, employers want to hire people they can train and mold into their ideal company representative so there’s a lot of people being rejected because of being “overqualified”. That’s because employers are not really looking for the most intelligent anymore. They are looking for someone who knows how to follow basic instructions and who will not challenge the company’s authority more so than how many degrees someone has. Even when it comes to experience, someone with these basic skills can be hired in a larger capacity than someone with years of job experience in that area. The most important section of your resume today is the “Skills” section.
Depending on what kind of job you’re looking for, make a list of your skills as it relates to that particular position. Write it on a spare piece of paper or whatever but just write down as many as you can. Go to your resume and under “Skills” list them all. Here’s an example of someone applying to a job in the area of Social Media Specialist:
• Strategic Planning
• Business Development
• Brand Identity
• Twitter Management
• Digital Asset Management
• Media Planning /Buying
• Facebook Advertising
• Market Research
• Technology Implementation
• Project Management
• Blogging /Blog Commenting
You may notice I included terms like “Blogging”, “Facebook Advertising”, and “Twitter Management”. This may not seem important but it is, leave nothing out. Any skill you have can be listed here. Sometimes people are looking for employment without really having had a job before and they think they have no skills. You’re alive and breathing aren’t you? Then you have skills! Everyone has something they can do or that they are good at. I don’t care if it’s babysitting, that’s something you can write down. It’s all about understanding the language. Turn “I watch my sister’s children” into keywords like:
• Child Care Development < you are responsible for their well-being
• Cooking / Meal Preparation < you cook for the children
• Creative Initiative < you have to find something for them to do
• Cleaning / Antiseptic Management < you clean up after the children
This will ensure your resume gets through the computer screening process. Now all you really have to do is polish up the other parts of the resume. It is also important, in my opinion, to have more than one resume for the different jobs to which you are applying. This is because a resume for Lead Cook at a restaurant will not look the same, or have the same keywords, as a resume for a school teacher. It is also important to update your resume at least yearly. If you change jobs often, every six months.
Remember, the resume is not designed to get you the job which is a truth I think many of us lose sight of. If you aren’t hired it’s not because your resume was bad, it’s because of other key factors that play a role. Your resume’s job is not to get you the job, its job is to get your foot in the door and by foot in the door I mean: past the screening, into the recruiters’ hands and your butt in the Interview chair.
Note: Oh, and if you can, try to limit your resume to one page. It looks more professional. Here’s a sample:
I’m a person who is either extremely excited, over the top silly or deeply saddened or concerned. I am either very serious or very silly. There is no lukewarm with me. There is no in-between. That said I try to also be very appreciative in my life. Appreciative of being alive another day. Appreciative of having a loving husband. Appreciative of loving family. Appreciative of supportive friends. Appreciative of a healthy mind and a healthy body. Sometimes you’ll see me get excited over certain achievements that may not look to be much but that mean everything to me. That’s because I think it’s important to always notice the little things.
It’s just that, the little things, that tests whether or not we are ready to move forward. It is the small steps we take every day, the trys that determine if we are worthy to move on. Without appreciating the small things it is not possible to hold on to the greater gifts to come. If I want my marriage to last I have to appreciate what is before my face now. Today. And when tomorrow comes, I can move forward and step into the shoes of what the future brings. And if I cannot for whatever reason appreciate what I have today, it is only hypocritical to think I am worthy of having possession of this relationship for an extended period of time.
I use my marriage just as an example, but we can apply this to our lives in general. Even when it comes to blogging. Yes, I blog a lot and I publish a lot and I share the work of others. I do this because I’m an all or nothing type of person. I am either going to put my all into it or I am going to abandon it. If I choose to give it my all, I will do so with the intent to nurture what I have been given and to plant the seeds that will grow to produce the kind of fruit I need to help to keep me fueled in whatever capacity that is. I believe blogging has been just as instrumental in my writing development as anything else in my life and though I do not see myself doing this forever, I take nothing for granted; or at least I try not to. The big things are always there and always will be there. They will always be at the forefront and on the top. They will always appear to be more shiny and glamorous and breathtaking. They will always promise to either validate you or break you but when it comes down to goals and ambitions and planning to implement a vision, it’s really not about the big things at all. It’s the little things that will actually help you to grow.
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