Title: A Subtle Art to Eliminating Anxiety and Stress from Your Life
Author: Michael Pukasta Jr.
Publisher: Michael Pukasta Jr.
Published: February 28, 2023
Pages: 104
According to the National Institute of Mental Health, one in eight Americans between the ages of 18 and 54 has anxiety, the author writes in A Subtle Art to Eliminating Anxiety and Stress from Your Life. It is second to drugs and alcohol in men and is one of the leading disorders in women. We discover that although stress is a natural part of life, if it is not controlled, it can accumulate in the body and cause anxiety and other illnesses.
The author helps the reader identify the compulsive habits causing us to be more stressed, such as obsessive negativity and perfectionism. Compulsive negativity causes us to have a predisposition to negativity where nothing is ever okay. The author calls this the “sour grape” attitude. Obsessive perfectionism causes us to be fixated on doing everything right to the point that we are constantly analyzing or trying to accomplish something instead of smelling the flowers. We might want to redo a task, delete a post because it’s imperfect (only to post it again), and basically drive ourselves insane.
The book is a quick read and a good reminder of the differences between stress and anxiety and provides some tools we can use to become better managers of our bodies (such as diet and exercise). There is even a quiz with questions to help readers to identify if they are depressed or not. While I found this a nice touch, the questions still fit the typical description most people associate with depression on the outside. Some people might answer no to the questions and still be depressed.
Overall, the book is an excellent reminder to keep our bodies healthy and our minds.
“We’ve all experienced worries and anxiety. While worrying can be beneficial when it motivates you to act and solve a problem, worrying excessively can take over your mind, impair your ability to manage your daily activities and wellbeing, interfere with your sleep and appetite, interfere with your social life, and make it difficult for you to focus.” – Michael Pukasta, Jr.
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Please help me extend a warm welcome to Terry Lister.
Welcome to the PBS Blog!
What is your name and where are you from?
My formal title is The Honorable Terry Lister, FCA, MBA, JP. While l had to work very hard to be given these titles, today l am retired. And in retirement, l have more or less retired my titles. I live in a much more relaxed manner than that under which l was burdened when l was working.
Nice. And where are you from?
I am from the beautiful island of Bermuda. We, Bermudians, believe that everyone has heard of us and thus knows where our island is but l know that both of these beliefs are false. We are an extremely small island located in the Atlantic some 700 miles from North Carolina. I have lived in Bermuda all my life except for ten years when l studied and worked in Ontario, Canada. The title The Honorable is due to my serving as a member of the Bermuda legislature for 21 years including ten years as a Minister of Government. I retired in 2014 and immediately took on my most enjoyable task of my life, that of being a slow solo traveler.
What was your childhood dream?
What I do today was always a dream for me but before I could get to it life stood in the middle. I had to get educated and I had to have a job, preferably one that paid lots of money. Growing up black in Bermuda meant that any black male who did not seek a career in the trades would have three choices: doctor, lawyer or teacher. Not wanting to do any of these, I was stumped until one day when asked for the 100th time I responded by saying I wanted to be an accountant. The questioner was floored, never had a little black boy said he wanted to be an accountant. Seeing the reaction this answer produced, I said it every time from about 12 on. It didn’t matter that I had no idea what an accountant did, I just knew it had to be special by the reaction of my questioners.
By the time I needed to make an informed response and I found out what an accountant did, I was so on it and that is what I became. By the age of 27 I was a partner in the Bermuda firm of Deloitte, becoming the first black person to be a partner in a then Big 8 Bermuda audit firm. So I made my dream come true and I never regretted this. The FCA behind my name is a special recognition in my profession given to a small number of the members due to distinguished service to the profession and the community.
Terry outside Bascillica, Ivory Coast
Wow. What an amazing and inspiring story.
What would be the most amazing adventure to go on or that you’ve been on?
Given that I am a full time traveler, I have been on many amazing adventures. However, if required to name one I would say it would be trekking Mountain Gorillas in Uganda.
Wait, what?
Your stories get better and better! Go on, tell us more.
As we were starting to leave the Gorillas and head out, one quickly came down a tree and landed very close to me. The guides tried to act calm but I could see some degree of fear. However, I acted as calmly as I could and waited for the gorilla to wander off. Got some great shots! While I do enjoy writing, travel is my first passion and many of the experiences I have had were simply mind blowing.
Wow. I bet. So, what state or country do you never want to go back to?
To date l have been to 95 countries…
Say whattt??
Just about every country has something about it that makes me wish I could go back. However, the one place I will not go back to is Tunisia. This northern African country was recently in the news about their behavior towards black Africans. I was there for 12 days in 2019. I was not treated with any warmth most of the time, often I had to fuss with taxi drivers to get them to take me where I wanted to go and, worst yet, I had an incident with the police who detained me for several hours for the crime of walking along a country road going to see a point of interest. There was a nasty undercurrent as I moved through various parts of the country and for that reason I would not return.
I’m so sorry you had to go through that craziness. Thanks for the heads up!
Let’s get into your publishing journey. When did you publish your first book?
I published my first book, Immersed in West Africa, in August 2019 just two months before my bad experience in Tunisia. My wife had organized a launch party which went really well and the book should have been off to a great start. However, we had selected a launch date and refused to move from it. The result was the publisher rushed the book and it was not a good product. Some of the attendees who bought books that night have chosen to not buy any books since which l find to be such a disappointment. When l realized the extent of the problem we sat down and fixed the flaws and put out another copy which has sold well. Beyond that this book has won 12 awards. Today, l am very proud of my first book, Immersed in West Africa.
And proud you should be. It is a wonderful and informative read. I’m glad you didn’t give up and re-released it.
What takes up too much of your time?
The most time consuming part of my writing is the marketing of the books. I am not a known author so l have to work every day to keep my books in front of people. It is both very time consuming and very challenging. Naturally, my genre is Travel and l write about my travels. So l cannot say, “enough of this, I am going to be a sci-fi writer.” Therefore I use up many hours doing things to get my books in front of potential readers.
Who is your favorite historical figure?
When l started high school way back in the dark ages, as my children would say, my class was taught Latin. Little did we learn but some of us took to the stories especially the Punic Wars and General Hannibal. He became and remains my favorite historical figure. When l went to Tunisia I went to see the remains of his city, Carthage. Consistent with the removal or destruction of many other creations of Black Africans prior to colonization, there was little to see while throughout Tunisia there are many Roman sites from the same and slightly later time period.
So, is the Honorable Terry Lister a political man?
Am I political? Does a horse drink water!
Yes, l served 21 years in the legislature of my country from 39 to 60. These were the peak years of my work life so it is impossible to not be political. However, I see my role today as observer and scribe. I spend very little time in political discussions or arguments as I was expected to do for the previous 21 years. My experience does make me well prepared to observe and to ask questions as l travel along.
You’re amazing.
Thank you, Terry Lister, for spending this time with us.We enjoyed you!
Terry Lister on the Skywalk at Kakum Nationsl Park in Ghana
Traveler and author Terry Lister enjoys both. Prior to this, he worked as a realtor, a minister in the Bermudan government, and a partner in the accounting firm Deloitte. However, he had always desired to travel, so in 2014, at the age of 60, he decided to retire and started traveling alone.
Lister had visited 48 nations when he retired, but since then, he has visited 50, staying in each for a week to six weeks. It’s been a journey! His first book, Immersed in West Africa, chronicled eight weeks of action-packed travel across five different West African nations. He has now traveled to 18 more countries in Africa and authored four more books.
While he is off the road, Mr. Lister enjoys unwinding with a good book, which must be historical or biographical. Although Terry would like to read more books in different genres, there are enough excellent novels in his field to keep him reading. He always has a few travel books in progress in anticipation of his upcoming trip.
Before leaving, Terry says he undertakes much research to identify activities that visitors are not always aware of. There is little time to be bored for this wanderer. He enjoys playing football and cricket in his spare time-cricket and football being his games. So little time to be bored!
Title: The Courage to be Disliked: The Japanese Phenomenon that Shows You How to Change Your Life and Achieve Real Happiness Author: Ichiro Kishimi and Fumitake Koga Publisher: Atria Books Published: May 8, 2018 Page: 289
Written by Japanese writer Fumitake Koga and philosopher Ichiro Kishimi, in The Courage to be Disliked, an older man who adheres to Adlerian psychology and Greek philosophy has a conversation about life with a young man who is frustrated with life and thinks it’s unfair. Their discussion is built on the question of whether we choose to be happy. The dialogue-based style makes me think of modern-day interactions between young people and older generations and our own inner dialogues about life. (Neither person is named throughout the book.)
The young person’s argument that the world is confusing is an example of their discussion. The philosopher responds by asserting that we make the world complex, not that everything is complicated. He contends that life is subjective, and because we each see the world differently, it’s impossible to share our world with anyone else. The philosopher’s responses are simple, leaving you to wonder why you hadn’t considered it that way. I also appreciated how the young man’s genuine inquiries allowed the author to instruct through the philosopher.
The main takeaway from Kishimi and Koga is that unhappy people wind up living other people’s lives by chasing approval. They give up their own hopes, dreams, and aspirations in favor of conforming to others’ expectations. An example would be a young person who wants to be an author deciding to instead go to medical school to please his parents, whose wish is for him to be a doctor.
He must muster up the courage to deal with his parents’ disapproval of his decision to follow his literary ambitions.
Over the course of five discussions, the philosopher explains to his student how each of us can choose our own path in life, free from the constraints of the past and the expectations of others.
While I can’t entirely agree with the part about how trauma, according to Adlerian psychology, does not exist (and the dialogue style throughout the book does not particularly appeal to me), it is still a terrific inspirational read if you are interested in philosophy and psychology or want to know why people believe the way they do. The discussion will inspire you to evaluate life from a unique angle, possibly one you haven’t thought about before.
Yecheilyah’s Book Reviews is a reputable review service that features writers from all over the world, both traditionally and independently published. We are listed on Kindlepreneur as a top-tier book review blog and Reedsy as one of their vetted active book blogs that provide insightful, excellent book reviews.
Today is a special edition of Introduce Yourself. Please help me to welcome Ashton Smith to The PBS Blog!
Ashton is an amazing young woman from Fort Worth, Texas, with a powerful story. She’s a world-medal award-winning swimmer, author, and corporate speaker. She is legally blind in one eye and has difficulty seeing out of the other, but she has not let this stop her from pursuing her athletic endeavors. Smith does not only swim but has been involved in bocce, track and field, basketball, and flag football. She has won gold medals and traveled the world.
However, Ashton’s journey has not been without trial.
According to the rules of the Special Olympics, they ban their athletes from making income. This left Ashton struggling to find a way to support herself even as she was competing. While headed to the World Games in Dubai, Smith struggled financially and fell into homelessness.
“I think it becomes unfair and harsh when members are prevented from earning a livelihood off of their own efforts. I think it’s unfair that a team member should have to be reduced to begging for money on the side of the road, which I had to do while being an athlete in the organization. I was required to raise money for the organization, yet when I started a GoFundMe, I was told to take it down. I was asked to stop asking the public for money.”
Without a home, Smith bounced around from place to place and depended on friends for help. When her grandmother died, she lost her only form of support.
“It was very hard, very difficult, and very tough because you didn’t know where your next meal would come from or certain things you wouldn’t know.”
Today, Ashton is committed to sharing her story to raise awareness about the unfair treatment she received as a disabled person.
“I find it odd that television networks aired my story about being homeless and nearly destitute, yet I couldn’t benefit from the content. They used it to make money, yet I was never given a dime. I’ve never gotten paid by ESPN or the organization but they used my story to make millions.”
Ashton’s grandmother and sister helped her financially. However, both have passed on, making getting around as a visually impaired person even more challenging.
Smith’s fight continues as she seeks to spread the word about her newfound purpose of being a voice for the voiceless. She achieves this through public speaking and her motivational memoir, which delves deep into her story and journey.
“I have decided to speak up and be an advocate for the disadvantaged.”
Please help me extend a warm welcome to Monique Johnson.
Welcome to the PBS Blog!
What is your name and where are you from?
I am Monique R Johnson, Los Angeles, CA born and raised, but moved to Fort Worth, Texas in 2019.
Nice. Cali to Texas is a big transition. What inspired the move?
I considered Texas several years prior. A couple of people I grew up with made the move over 15 years ago. It was when I started dating a guy I worked with who, later took a job in Texas, that I reconsidered.
What would your perfect writing / reading room look like?
My perfect writing and reading room would look like a university library.
Nicee! I’m loving it already.
I’d have a writing desk with the perfect desk lamp for late-night writing. I’d have a bookcase with books from various genres: motivation, Christian spiritual, financial, self-help, poetry, and a few children’s books for my grands. I would have a leather recliner and a tall, full bird of paradise plant in the corner near the window.
What is the most annoying habit that you have?
Correcting grammar. It gets on everyone’s nerves.
So YOU the grammar police!
If you could do anything else, what job do you think you’d be really good at?
Lawyer. I love to make my point.
Lol. Any siblings Monique?
Three biological brothers, one step-brother, and three step-sisters.
If you had unlimited funds to build a house that you would live in for the rest of your life, what would the finished house be like?
Mansion, with an east and west wing, two kitchens, game room, media room, living room, enclosed patio, herb and vegetable garden on one side of the back yard, a dog run in the other, and an in-ground swimming pool in the center. The house would have a balcony with an amazing view. The bathroom would have a walk-in shower, with a waterfall feature and a sitting area.
Let’s get into writing a bit. What genre do you write in and why?
Mixed Genre of non-fiction with a dramatic approach and a sprinkle of poetry to end each chapter. I love writing this way because it makes it more engaging and easier to explain how people can get unstuck.
Why is writing important to you?
I write for my family and generations to come so that they will know how I made it through the toughest times in my life. I want readers of my work, be it my poetry, my magazine articles, or my novel, to know that an everyday person like themselves can get through whatever they are dealing with if they decide to believe that they can.
When did you publish your first book?
My first Anthology was published December 2021. My first memoir was published June 30, 2022. It was exciting and challenging for me. I learned that publishing is not the hard part, it’s the promotion and marketing that’s hard for me.
I get it. So what takes up too much of your time?
Figuring out systems for my business and now my book journey.
In your book, you talked a lot about how your faith got you through a lot of the pain. Do you consider yourself a religious person?
I am not religious in that I do not believe in all of the rules and traditions that mark religions. I do follow the teachings of Jesus Christ. I believe Christ was a spiritual teacher and healer, but the world was not ready to receive such a reality. Religion nailed him to the cross.
If you had one superpower that could change the world, what would it be?
To make everyone love each other with a Godly love.
What does a Godly love look like?
A Godly love looks like a man and woman who puts God first, demonstrates unconditional love, sacrifices for one another, and goes to God in prayer over situations the couple cannot handle in their own strength.
What are your thoughts on race?
We should embrace our differences, and not be opinionated on who is the better of the races. The conflict is in the ignorance of one or the other and the fear.
What do you think of police brutality in the black community?
I am mixed on it. I am a mother of black sons and they express to me that they know how to do the psychological game with the police so, thank God, they’ve not been a victim of it. They have been stopped, even arrested, but never mishandled. How can we do better? I think all of our people who have been victimized, profiled, or targeted by law enforcement should learn to use psychology, or better yet wisdom instead of responding with emotions. That is not helping during intense situations.
How would one use the study of the mind to avoid police brutality? Can you give some examples of how getting overly emotional could worsen already intense situations?
For example, if an officer is approaching a black man on a routine traffic stop, or suspicious activity, the black man should not react in a defensive, or in any way that can be taken as uncooperative, or threatening. Instead, he should be compliant, ask what the stop is for, ask if he is being put under arrest, and get the officers names. A calm, unemotional state of mind will put the officer a little more at ease, thus de-escalating the situation.
Now Monique…
You KNOW I got more questions, chile. But, let’s move on.
What advice would you give your younger self?
Life is not always pretty. We all experience hardship every now and again.
What is your best advice for reducing stress?
Get enough word in you to have something to meditate on when you are getting overwhelmed. Walk, bike ride, or spend time doing dedicated workouts. Eat healthy.
In your own words, what is humility?
Maintaining a grateful attitude, not thinking you deserve all the accolades, but are willing to share the spotlight. Gracious in your acceptance of gifts, complements, and is not easily offended.
What is love?
God. It is receiving others right where they are without judgement. Accepting the good and the bad. Tolerance. Caring about your fellow human. Forgiving.
Thank you, Monique, for spending this time with us.We enjoyed you!
Monique Johnson is a native Californian who relocated to Texas in pursuit of new opportunities just before the world-wide pandemic and social unrest. She is the former founder and president of a nonprofit after school program she created to help keep teens off of the streets. She brought awareness to the Prison Industrial Complex and how it’s growth was planned based on statistics pulled from the minority population. These stats have been improperly used to build more prisons, thus keeping this population incarcerated. She mentored youth to keep them from making bad choices that could land them in the unforgiving criminal justice system.
Johnson motivates single mothers, women in general, as well as young men to push through the hard parts of life. She is an experienced trainer, speaker, project manager, and has a gift of leadership as displayed in her professional career and community. Her books and her upcoming workshops are geared toward her goal to help women and men in their business, personal and spiritual development.
Title: Relentlessly Resilient: Overcoming the Resistance Author: Monique Johnson Publisher: Monique Johnson Published: July 4, 2022 Pages: 193
In Relentlessly Resilient, the author gives us an unflinching look at her life as a young woman enduring trial after trial and her resolve to overcome all the hurdles thrown her way. Seduced by the cute, play-boy, roughneck types, Monique learns the hard way that looks can deceive when a boy she falls for forces himself on her.
From the trauma of sexual assault, becoming a young mother, battling diabetes, and much more, this book kicks into gear quickly, starting with a series of tumultuous relationships, including dating a guy who had become addicted to drugs. I grew up around many addicts in the projects, including my parents, so I know their ways and could empathize with how she felt about the disappearing acts and stolen TV.
When she went to get the stolen bike back from the dealer, I was yelling at the book at this point. Girl, what are you doing? But nothing happened, to which the author credits her faith. The dealer actually gave her the bike back. Whew. That was close.
I enjoyed the author’s candor when discussing her thought patterns during these challenging times and talking us through the lessons she learned. One of the most important ones involved her son, Tyrell. Although she was working hard and providing for her son’s needs physically, she projected the stress she took on onto him every time she yelled at him to get ready or couldn’t spend time with him because of her busy schedule.
Relentlessly Resilient is a story I believe we can all relate to on some level. At the end of each chapter, the author shares a reflection as a final touch.
Monique’s story is a reminder of the strength of the human spirit. Constantly thrown through life’s curveballs, the author always recovers quickly and regains her strength.
Title: Living in the Land of I am: Your Life Journey Reveals Your Purpose Author: Tiffany James Publisher: Encourage Touch Enterprise ASIN: B07SB68C1F Publication date: May 22, 2019 Print length: 158 pages
Living in the Land of I am: Your Life Journey Reveals Your Purpose is a hopeful read about the importance of embracing your authentic self and operating in that truth. According to the author, losing our identity also means relinquishing the authority given to us to fulfill our purpose. (p. 67)
I enjoyed the author’s testimony, examples, and analogies to expand on her point further. We are invited into her world and we learn the many things she overcame and how we too can live in that land of I am, that is our truest self. We learn there is beauty in acknowledging and accepting one’s set-apartness.
My favorite example is the one of Simba from Disney’s 1994 animated feature film, The Lion King. The story of how he was born into royalty and stood proud and strong in that purpose until the death of his father Mufasa made him lose his voice was very nicely recounted.
When Simba meets Pumbaa and Timon and starts basking in what looks like a carefree life, the author reminds us that while he seems happy, he forgets that he was born to be a King. Now a grown lion, Simba has been reduced to a confused, scared, angry, and hurt little cub (p.37). When he returns to fulfill his purpose, he becomes the strong and mighty lion he was born to be. I thought this laid a strong foundation for the rest of the book.
I was not a big fan of the author’s Christian views because I’m not a Christian. Still, overall, I found the book to be a great reminder of the importance of standing in our truth and being authentically and unapologetically ourselves.
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