Define Your Goals #MayChallengeDay14-15

smart-goals

I always say that I don’t really sit down to seriously write a book until I know how it ends. The reason I stick to this strategy is the same reason most of us have such a difficult time reaching our goals: We don’t define them. If I don’t know where I’m going with a story, the ultimate ending, I usually have a hard time getting into the flow. The flow. Its that first draft stage where you put your head down and you do not come back up until the work is done. Not even for air. You worry not about the technicalities of the work or what other people are saying about the publishing industry. Those things will become nothing more than a distraction. Well, at least to me (I can’t speak for you). So, as for me, once I do get started I can’t  worry about typos, editing or what Stephen King said. Not right now. Not in that moment. At that point I’m just trying to get the basic layout on paper. But how can I lay the foundation that will lead me to a certain point if I don’t know what that point is? I cannot build a brick house until I know I want it made of brick, least I lay the foundation with straw.

The same can be said of our life, our blogs, or whatever it is we set out to do. One thing I’ve learned over the years is the power of patience. Oh patience! I was in such need of it. If I could have bought endurance in a bottle I would have done it. I realized that my lack of patience was draining all of the potential out of my work. Why? Well because I was rushing an idea and not sitting down to seriously analyze what it will take to bring that idea forward. And not only to bring it forward but to seriously consider the plausibility of the idea. Does it makes sense? Is it real? And not only is it real, but do I believe in seriously reaching this goal that I have set for myself or is it just a dream? I hear people talk a lot about following your dreams. People are fond of dreaming, but as long as we are still dreaming our goals will be just that: imaginary.

Anyone can set goals. We’ve all been to school or to some educational setting even if it were our own living rooms, where someone told us to sketch out our short term and long term goals. In short, many of us know exactly where we want to go, and where we want to be. The problem is not the goal itself. It’s not that it is too difficult or too simple. The problem is that we have no clear vision of how we plan to get there.

The chart in this post is a great start. Make sure that your goals are: Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Realistic, and Timely. I tried to think about which of these was the most important, but I think they all are. If your goal is not specific enough then it won’t be measurable. If goals are not measurable then they won’t be achievable and a goal that is achievable is naturally also not realistic. If your goal is not realistic then there is no real time limit that can be placed on it. Which in turn means its more likely to stay in lala land than put into action.

What I Learned About Blogging, Writing, and Life #MayChallengeDay 11-12

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Sometimes we just want the easy answer. The easy answer, and the smooth path. We want to lower mountains, and bring them down to our understanding. And we want as many tips on how to do so as is possible; we want things to be as easy as possible. But what I have learned, whether about blogging, writing, or life in general is this: You can have all the talent, and all of the opportunity in the world but if you do not have the persistence, the endurance, or the discipline to keep working then you do not have anything. Determination is called drive for a reason, it moves you.

Social Media and Networking

“Had I stopped after the first “failure” you would never have heard of this site. You would not be reading this right now. How much is lost because people simply give up.” – JC

(Keep Grinding People)

EC Quote Friday – MayChallengeDay6

Yayy, I made it through the first week of the May Challenge! Is anyone else playing? Because I feel like the only one lol. I rest on Saturdays so unfortunately I will not participate in this challenge on Saturdays so I will see you all Sunday. I plan to incorporate some flash fiction and poetry into Week Two, time permitting. In the meantime, below is your EC Quote Friday:

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Why I Go #UNDERGROUND

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If you could go back to Harriet Tubman’s days and with what you know now, help her to free more slaves based on your knowledge of the future, would you be able to help her? With what you know about history today, would you be able to assist her in carrying more people to freedom? With all of the technology and historical knowledge and books and slave narratives and everything you’ve stored away to this point, could you honestly say that you could help her? Many of us don’t even know what direction the sun rises and sets in, let alone navigate without GPS. This is why I watch shows such as #Underground.

What amazes me is that when a Tyler Perry movie comes out, we don’t hear nothing about how we’re tired of seeing black men in dresses. I don’t hear anything about how we’re tired of seeing black men and women run around joking all the time about nothing. We make excuses for that. We don’t hear nothing about Fifty Shades of Black, Get Hard, or throwbacks like Don’t Be A Menace to South Central While Drinking Your Juice in the Hood. When Noah and Gods of Egypt came out, I didn’t hear nothing about all the biblical inaccuracies that can be proven just by reading the first few chapters of Genesis. But when it comes to a show comprised of information we need to know, now we’re tired of slave movies even though many of our brothers and sisters don’t even know what the half of slavery was really about and the psychological trauma it still holds today.

I’m still hearing people say that the light skin slaves were house slaves but this is not historically correct. The Mulatto was the first to be sold because the mistress did not want to look at the proof of her husbands infidelity with the “niggers” every time she looked at those children. Not that mulattoes were not in the house, but the point is they were “field niggas” too. There was a ranking system based on skill and worth and it didn’t matter what color you were a slave was a slave. Whether in house or in the field none of it was esteemed over the other you was still a slave. Some of us still think Rosa Parks was the first to refuse to give up her seat on a bus. She was not, but that’s the point. There’s still lots of people who don’t know. We don’t know what Reconstruction was about. We don’t know what Jim Crow was about. We don’t know what The Harlem Renaissance was about, or for a more earlier term, The New Negro Movement. We don’t know what The Civil Rights Movement was about. We don’t even know who The Black Panthers truly were aside from the hateful militia group people tell us they were. Prince just died and they say he had no will. Prince was a man who sued people all the time in regard to the legalities of his career. He’s not the kind of man who would not have a will but this is what they tell us. The point is that we don’t know half of the black history that we think we know and even what we think we know, we don’t really know. What Harriet Tubman and the many others had to endure, I had to endure too. For we are all connected, the human family. We are the bloodline and the experiences of our ancestors  still runs through our veins. They say that if you don’t know your history, that you are bound to repeat it.  This is why I go #Underground.

Bloggers: May You Come Out of The Closet – #May Challenge Day 1

No, not like that. By “Come Out of The Closet” I just mean to reveal yourself to your readers. I know, I know, you MAY not consider yourself to be that much of a blogger to have “readers”. It MAY feel arrogant in nature, narcissistic or whatever, but the truth is that its not. It doesn’t matter how big or small your blog is we all have readers. There is someone somewhere who reads your blog. Someone somewhere who is always watching, silently and consistently keeping track of everything you post. Scary isn’t it? In some ways yes. You MAY feel that one day you’re going to be judged, called out, accused. I wouldn’t worry about that. First of all, no one reading this is my judge. Neither of you have the power to give my breath or to take it away from me. So for me personally, if I were you, judgement is not something I would worry about.

Today is the first day of the #May Writing Challenge and my first message is MAY you come out of the closet. For most of our lives we’ve been taught to keep our skeletons in the closet, which means to keep those most intimate parts of ourselves, those mistakes and faults secret. The closet represents something hidden, the heart if you will. We are taught to keep our deepest darkest secrets in the deepest darkest places of our hearts. The problem with blogging this way is that readers will never get the chance to see who you truly are. It is not about airing dirty laundry (My motto is always to: Keep Ya House Out Ya Mouth” meaning everything that goes on in your home should not be shared). So obviously we’re not talking about that. What we’re talking about is the kind of openness and intimacy that will allow people to get to know the real you because that’s what people want to connect to. Not something fake, something transparent, something real.

Bloggers: May You Come Out of The Closet

Tell us something about you that is personal. By personal I mean your favorite food, music, movie, your mistakes, your experiences. By personal I mean something that we can connect to. Something we can bridge to. Experiences are what connects us. Sure, we MAY make mistakes but that’s the beauty behind the whole process. Re-blogs are cool, writing tips are always good, and quotes are uplifting but sometimes that gets boring. It gets boring because people read blogs not just to be inspired or encouraged but to be informed. People want to know who you are on the inside, what your life is like, or did that new recipe work out for you? Yesterday I read a post about a woman’s journey to conception and it was truly touching and close to my heart. Truth is you never know how sharing your experiences can help others. In the end its about blogging without fear. Don’t be afraid to share a piece of yourself with your readers so that they can have something to connect to. Its the only way to build.

Life

So what’s going on people? It’s been awhile since we talked together so I thought we’d do that today. So…

OK, I’ll go first.

So my husband is doing well. His leg is strong and we’re getting back in the swing of things. Though I do hate he’d have to go back to work soon…boo. Oh, and I do have an exciting new update. I’ve been on baby duty lately. No, I’m not pregnant (yet lol) but I am baby sitting and I must say he’s the absolute cutest. So yea, he’s the culprit taking up my blogging time. You cutie you!

BJ
Nephew BJ, Age: 1

BJ has been waking me at 7am with sweet kisses and lots of love. I mean, just look at him. Who can resist that face?

Hmm, what else? I went to Houston recently so that was pretty cool. Got to spend some much needed family time and all that good stuff. I mean, I had to do some work too but I enjoyed seeing the fam while we were there. It’s been raining a lot lately too, which of course is inspiration to write more. I’m pretty sure everyone reading this blog know how much I love the rain by now. I love the calmness of the air and listening to the wind.

That’s it for me, for now. So, what’s up with you all? How is life?