#Ronovan Writes #BeWoW Weekly Blog Prompt – Connections

What connects one person to another? What provokes them to inspire, encourage, and to display characteristics of kindness? What makes them care so deeply about the whereabouts and well-being of others as if come from themselves? As if attached at the hip, what makes an individual go out on limbs, what makes them sacrifice?

be-wow-bloggerIn “A Child is Born” a great photographic look on life inside the womb, Lennart Nilson and Lars Hamberger begin their work with love:

“Love is an incredibly strong, enduring force and has been since time immemorial. The pattern is recognized in every culture in our world: two people are mutually attracted and feel the irresistible urge to unite.”

41PF7EZB94LWhen a baby first emerges from his mother’s womb, he is looking for Love. It is the reason he comes out crying. Once safely enveloped in the serenity of his mother’s womb, he emerges into this strange place and must instantly reconnect with love. So he cries, and she cries for it. And in their innocence this love connection is worn like a sacred garment until we reach the age where we are taught to hate. This teaching may take many forms, but we are taught it and eventually we lose our innocence, we lose the ability to love. Maybe we saw something that disturbed us; maybe we were traumatized by an experience. Whatever the reason, when we reach a certain age, a world that is absent of Love eventually teaches us how not to Love, and we thus spend the rest of our lives in search of this connection.

I seek to re-connect with people through love. Despite the stigmatizing of this word, the carelessness in which it is handled, and the abuse it has endured, Love is not just a word. It is not just here for our convenience when we need something or when we think it will be of benefit to us. Love is not just a four letter word we use to justify our wrong, but Love is action. It is not just spoken, it is seen. We see it when people forgive each other. We see it when a homeless man is fed. We see it when a wrong person is corrected. We see it when a hug is distributed. Not only do we see it, we hear it. The beautiful thing about love and how it connects one person to another is that it surpasses language barriers, and culture clashes. If I travel to China and I see that an elderly man has fallen while walking down the street, I will move to assist him so that he stands back on his feet. I have no knowledge of Chinese, but I do know the language of love. Likewise, for many of you good people out there, if you saw that I was in distress, you will move to give encouragement when you see that it is needed. So love is also an interpreter. It has the ability to discern motives and acts as a guide. In this way, we build a bridge of cohesion that makes room for further understanding of one another as individuals. Because there is an absence of Love in the world, it has caused us to disconnect and forget how to treat one another and how to build positive relationships.

So for this week’s Positive #BeWoW Post, I am re-connecting through love. Continuously seeking to better understand what it is, how to distribute it, and how to accept it.

In-between the Lines

Words-are-Powerful - blog 3

Trees that died in vain
Wasted paper
Blind post
Wingless words
On a road to nowhere
Reaching no one
It seems
invisible value
but learn to value what the eye cannot see
To dance to whispered songs
With loud messages
Screaming purpose
that it takes another set of eyes to see
Regular eyeballs just can’t
Invisible trees stand erect in that storage place
Invisible bank accounts
Unseen credit
A worth beyond the U.S. dollar
cuz its backed by paper
but these trees never die in vain
wasted paper
blind post
wingless words
on a road to somewhere
behind the eyes
a purpose beyond the page
and in-between the lines

Lasting Marriages – Miracles in Disguise

Circa: 2012, me and Hubby on the way to New Orleans to port for our 7 day Cruise
Circa: 2012, me and Hubby on the way to New Orleans to port for our 7 day Cruise

“As far as I’m concerned, if a Black man and woman make marriage work in amerika, they’ve accomplished a miracle. Because everything is against them. Just being poor is one of the biggest obstacles. Most of the arguments are about money. It’s hard to be loving and caring when you can’t pay the bills and you don’t know where the next dollar is coming from”

– Assata Shakur

This excerpt from Assata’s autobiography is so on point that I had to share it with you. This I do not limit to Black people but all people. Marriage is something I think we take highly for granted. It is one of the oldest institutions in which requires so much work and yet receives so little praise. I just want to take the time to encourage all of my married people, especially my married Black people, since our divorce rates are higher than any ethnic group. As Assata has mentioned, it is a struggle to focus on the love you have with one another when there are so many other distractions surrounding the basics. Trying to live life, fulfill a career, rear the children, pay bills, it all gets cloudy sometimes. But we cannot allow this to damage the beauty of the coming together of man and woman. I have been married for seven years now and we’ve been together eight total. One of the things we love to do together (aside from travel) is movie night. It started as something sporadic and has now become a tradition. Now movie night is every night! Lol. It gives us the opportunity to enjoy each others company after a long day with life. When we come into the door and we finish our dinner and all the miscellaneous things in preparation for the next day; when the lights dim and the surround sound begins, we try to leave everything else behind us. No smartphone. No internet. No talk about work and bills and blah blah blah, just me and him. It nurtures our relationship in ways that are probably far more impactful than we can realize at this moment. While I still consider myself a newlywed as compared to some of you veterans, I just want to encourage you to find an activity you share with your hubby or wifey that no matter what happens in the world, it does not get in the way of your bond. In the words of Lena Horne “It’s not the load that weighs you down, it’s the way you carry it”. So shift some of that weight, get rid of some even. But find something to do together that makes the whirling world stand still. Be honest and open with each other concerning your flaws and doubts and feelings and allow the love that brought you together to be a kind of therapy within not just your marriage, but in your life. Marriage is work and anyone who tells you different is a liar. It is not easy and sometimes it can be a real struggle. It is for this reason that if you are married and have been for some time, across nationalities, if you are still married, then you are a living miracle. Never underestimate that.