Tag: grace

Lessons from Grace Part Two

Photo by GEORGE DESIPRIS

These are the lessons I am learning thus far on my journey to give myself more grace.

Take the Pressure Off

Story A.

I was never under any pressure to share the same stuff on all of my social media channels. I have never automated my posts to ensure that what I write to one also appears on the other, for this reason. Early on, I recognized that each medium had a slightly different audience. And I rarely received the same reaction when I attempted to post the same thing. At times, it works, but it’s not something I do often. Each platform, to me, is its own. Therefore, what I post to TikTok won’t necessarily make it to Instagram, and what I post to Instagram won’t necessarily make it to Facebook. (Hardly anything makes it to Facebook. It is my least favorite platform.)

Story B.

This weekend, I am excited to attend my family’s annual BBQ. That’s right. My Chi-town homies are coming down for us to meet in Augusta, GA, for some family time.

We were all to stay at the same hotel until my cousin called and said a group of them would stay at an Airbnb.

“Okay cool. Imma cancel our room then and find a cheaper hotel.”

I’m not staying at an overpriced hotel that everyone else is suddenly not staying at. (Cause how ya’ll just gonna leave.)

Nope. Imma find something else. (And I did at a little over $100 cheaper with the same quality.)

What’s my point of these two stories?

  • Take the pressure off yourself to do what everyone else is doing, appear polished and put together, or post eighty-six times a day.
  • Take the pressure off yourself to show up in spaces you are not comfortable with to make other people comfortable. This includes spending money you don’t want to spend.
  • Take the pressure off yourself to respond immediately to emails, text messages, and comments.
  • Take the pressure off yourself to agree with everything, overextend yourself, or do more work than is necessary.
  • Take the pressure off yourself to always go the extra mile, even when no one is going the extra mile for you.

Give yourself more grace by taking the pressure off.

Rest well this weekend guys!

Rest Fuels Creativity

Novella Tolbert, my late Dad’s mom, aka my 100-year-old Granny!

Last week, I went home to Chicago and saw my dad’s side of the family for the first time in fifteen years. We extravagantly celebrated my grandmother’s 100th birthday in classic Tolbert fashion. I planned to bring my laptop but left it at home. Instead of squeezing in work, I played with babies and reminisced on memories.

Successful entrepreneurs travel a lot, but that travel is usually associated with the business. There is even a thing called work-cation, where you work while on vacation.

That’s all fine and dandy, but it is also not real rest.

Photo by Ihsan Adityawarman

It has been proven that taking frequent short breaks throughout the day improves productivity – but they need to be real breaks.

For example, not posting to social media while taking a social media break also includes not mindlessly scrolling or opening apps.

You must entirely disengage from whatever you are doing for a break to be truly rejuvenating.

Creative moments occur when the mind is relaxed rather than actively working since this is when the brain’s creative centers are most active.

I noticed that while in Chicago, I did not worry about my manuscript or work, even as orders poured in for book reviews.

Much of that has to do with a promise I made to myself at the end of 2022 that 2023 wouldn’t be a year of fatigue and exhaustion. I vowed not to rush the process or take on too much.

Rather than take my laptop and edit, I spent most of the time eating, laughing, sleeping, and basking in my family’s love.

Janiyah (12), and Jamie (4)

I learned that my 12-year-old niece didn’t know who Emmett Till was, so we took her and baby girl with us to the DuSable Museum.

Things are coming to me effortlessly as a result of letting things be. Yesterday, I found out that I am Soul (which is now at 71 reviews on Amazon!) and TWWBE are nearly sold out at Medu (again), identified a location for a future project, and established the groundwork for an event to celebrate National Poetry Month in April.

Have a restful weekend good people!

As the cool air whistles in from my back door, which is open, and the birds chirp their favorite afternoon tunes, I will continue to allow things to flow smoothly as I become a better version of myself.

Lessons from Grace Part One

Photo by GEORGE DESIPRIS

These are the lessons I’ve learned thus far on my journey to give myself more grace.

Commit to Working More on Yourself than Your Business

Because my mindset determines the direction of everything I do, I’ve learned to prioritize my personal development over my business. I’ve realized that adequate rest, a healthy body, and a healthy sense of self-worth aren’t optional; they’re required for increased creativity and productivity. My self-esteem affects how I interact with others and make business decisions.

I accept that to triumph in the daily battle, I must have a strong faith/mind and be rooted in something greater than myself.

I am my best work, and when I am good, everything around me is good. To quote the African proverb, “When there is no enemy within, the enemy outside cannot hurt you.” (Unknown)

Rest well this weekend guys!