No Whining Wednesday: Hold Onto Your Sacredness

Sweet soul. Do not allow yourself to be treated less than sacredly. You may need to learn how to treat yourself sacredly along the way. Maybe no one in your family knew what sacredness looked like. Maybe each of you inherited desecration. Once you set a sacred standard, it does not matter how the world treats you. You will have your template, your expectation, your boundary. From this foundation, you can develop the muscles for letting go of what does not choose to or is not able to relate to you sacredly. You see? You are sacred because you are life. You do not have to earn your sacredness. You exist. Therefore, you are sacred.

– Jaiyah John


This was the most beautiful message posted by Jaiyah John, and I had to share it for No Whining Wednesday. We had not had one in a while, and I’d love to get back into it.

What is NWW?

The No Whining Wednesday Badge

No Whining Wednesdays is a term coined by Iyanla Vanzant that I decided to adopt to practice the art of complaining less and being more grateful. It is the deliberate act of looking at the good before considering the bad. Incorporated into a blog series, this means that for the entire day on Wednesdays, we try not to:

– Whine

– Complain

– Criticize

Here are some definitions:

To Whine – give or make a long, high-pitched complaining cry or sound; to grumble, murmur or complain in a feeble way.

To Complain – express dissatisfaction or annoyance about a state of affairs or an event; state that one is suffering from; state of grievance.

To Criticize – indicate the faults of (someone or something) in a disapproving way; to condemn, attack, discourage.


Now, I don’t believe there is no room for complaining. That wouldn’t be realistic. There are legitimate reasons to voice complaints and express grievances. This series is about being aware of the frequency to which we find ourselves complaining about things that, at a closer glance, do not deserve our energy or are not as monumental as they may seem. To quote Dr. Nicole LePera, it is a practice in emotional regulation, “having the skills to cope with negative emotions and process them in healthy ways.”

And to also refrain from criticizing others. While there might be room to complain, there is never a reason to condemn.

New to this?

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Check Out the Archive Here and Catch Up!

No Whining Wednesday – Embrace the Quiet

Welcome back to No Whinging Wednesday! The only day of the week where you do not get to whine, criticize, or complain. If you’re new to this blog, click HERE to learn more about NWW.

The No Whining Wednesday Badge
The No Whining Wednesday Badge

This week has been a week of quiet for me. Of reflection and deep thought. So, I thought of a wonderful quote to help to get us through this day. This week, we will attempt to capture peace and free ourselves from complaining through something that seems simple to do but is more complicated than it seems on the surface: Be still. Do you know how to Be still? Stillness can be defined as:

“The absence of movement or sound.”

Of course, this doesn’t have to mean literally without sound or movement. More like being slow to speak and thinking critically before making a decision (movement). During times you feel like arguing or snapping or getting upset and frustrated do not look for the answer, just wait. I love how Rainer Maria Rilke said, “Try to love the questions themselves. Like locked rooms and like books written in a foreign language. Do not now look for the answers. They cannot now be given to you because you could not live them.”

Wait for mental clarity. Wait for the calmness to return. Wait for the right words to speak. Just wait. Be still. Do not worry about what move to make. Today is not about moving anything. Today is about being still. Here’s our  motivating quote:

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No Whining Wednesday – Complainers

“Tell me the alarm clock stole the keys to your smile, drove it to 7 am and the crash totaled your happiness. Tell me, tell me how blessed are we to have tragedies so small it can fit on the tips of our tongues.”

– Rudy Francisco

Welcome back to No Whining Wednesday, the only day of the week where you do not get to whine, complain, or criticize. If you’re new to this blog, check out post one for more on what this segment is all about. Check it out HERE.

Today I have a special dose of inspiration for you complainers out there. Below is a poem by Rudy Fransisco, an excellent poet, on complaining. Enjoy. (If you’re in a country where this video does not show, you can search it on YouTube wherever you are. Search Complainers by Rudy Francisco.)

“It doesn’t matter if the glass is half empty or half full, there’s water in the cup, drink it.” – R.F.

No Whining Wednesday – Endurance

The No Whining Wednesday Badge
The No Whining Wednesday Badge

Welcome back to No Whining Wednesday, the only day of the week that you do not get to whine, complain, or criticize.

If you’re new to this, please visit Week One HERE. (I have also added the badge to the sidebar).

Each week I will post an inspiring quote to help you to get through the day. And not just you of course but me too. In fact, this quote is inspired by my experience last week. By talking with you guys about it I learned that it wasn’t such a bad day, just that I needed to endure for a little while before things went smooth. Isn’t that what struggle is all about? Today is all about persevering, resolve, and endurance. Try not to take the situations you face today so personally. Instead, think about how you can get through the situation and what you may learn from the experience.

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This quote is so speaking to my life right now! I hope it gives you just as much courage to face today as it’s doing me. It’s the middle of the work week but don’t let life make you a slave to the weekend. Even though it’s around the corner, you can enjoy TODAY just the same. To your success.

Update: How Did You Do?

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So, how was No Whining Wednesday? You can be honest. I will.

Before I do, for those new to NWW, see last weeks post HERE to understand what it is, what it’s about and how to participate. Tomorrow is our second week of the newest feature to The PBS Blog and I’m going to try to do better because I was a mess last week. I failed miserably.

AND, I didn’t even have any quarters.

You know what, I don’t even want to talk about it.

OK, OK, I will. But only because I like you. What had happend was…

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I woke up that morning to a situation that brought me to tears. Not just tears but TEARS. I was balling. Here I was balled up on the floor praying away the anguish on the first day, but that’s not all.

Eventually, I decided to be a big girl about it and clean myself up because I remembered that it was No Whining Wednesday and I wasn’t supposed to be whining, let alone crying. I decided I would make pancakes before I got to work. Usually I’d just grab a cup of coffee or maybe some fruit so I was treating myself. So I thought.

This is Tuesday so I’ll get all my complaining out the way now. I hate…OK, hate is such a strong word… I dislike very much the taste of pancakes using oil. I like to use butter instead. For the twenty-nine years I’ve been on this Earth, my pancakes have always done well using butter. Except last Wednesday. They started to stick. I changed pans, thinking it was because I wasn’t using the cast iron skillet. It started to stick again and not just a little bit but like crazy. So, I started again using oil. It started to stick again. I should mention my sister in law is visiting. My plan was to make us a nice breakfast this morning (since I admittedly let her feign for herself the first night.)

My sister-in-law, awakened by the noises coming from the kitchen, walks in.

“Don’t worry, I’ll still eat them. I don’t really know how to make pancakes myself.”

“But I do! I do know how to make pancakes! Uhhgg.”

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After giving the pan (the butter and the oil) a piece of my mind I remembered this was No Whining Wednesday (something I started) and that I was definitely not winning.

At the end of it all the pans started to behave themselves and my pancakes and turkey bacon came out lovely.

The rest of the day smoothed itself out and all of my locs are still here. By the end of the day Wednesday all was well. I think I even had enough time left in the day to watch a chick flick (which turned out to be whack but I didn’t complain. I’d already done enough of that.) As I think back on it now it didn’t turn out so bad (maybe I just needed to write it out?) but I definitely had a rocky start.

So, how about you? I know you did better than me.

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