No Whining Wednesday – The Company You Keep

Welcome back lovelies! To another No Whining Wednesday, the only day of the week where you do not get to whine, criticize, or complain for a 24hour period. If you are new to this blog or new to this segment, please visit the first post HERE to understand what this is all about.

The No Whining Wednesday Badge

Today’s inspiration is Will Smith’s Instagram video. It has been making its way around social media and for good reason. We live in a world dominated by social media and for this, it’s important to remember that everybody who LIKES you don’t “Like” you. In fact, I am willing to bet that many of us have people on our Facebook “friends” list who are not our friends and people who like our every post but will not reach out in real life. People who say they support you but have never bought a book or left a review or just helped you to promote your work. This goes far beyond writing, this is about life. Who we surround ourselves with has a lot to do with the person we eventually become. This is how important associations are. If the people around you are not encouraging you, lifting you up, inspiring you, correcting you, helping you, etc, why are they around you? Why are we allowing people who do nothing for us to have so much access to us?

“Defend your light with your life.”

What Really Grinds My Gears

You wanna know what really grinds my gears?

  1. When you see someone doing something you perceive to be wrong, or maybe it is wrong, and instead of pulling them to the side (a personal message or email) you create a whole blog post about it or social media post, that you know the person will see in the next 3 minutes. A lot of confusion and assumption would be eliminated if people just talked to each other. If you see someone doing something wrong, don’t talk about them. Help them. Pull them aside privately, “Hey sista”, or “Hey brother, you’re doing this wrong.” Wars are built on a misunderstanding. (And, for the record people, everyone’s not hating on you. Sometimes you’re just wrong.)

 

  1. Goodreads Reviews. Goodreads reviews really grinds my gears. Of course, this doesn’t apply to everyone but I’ve noticed that reviews left on Goodreads are a lot less tactful and professional. An honest review does not mean you have to humiliate people. If an author is going to be on Goodreads then they should have thick skin because people are mean there, sometimes bringing up valid points but with no filter. And yes, I did grow up in the projects so I am used to this behavior (laughing but serious), but not everyone is. We seem to forget that people (even adults) have feelings.

 

  1. Non-Creative Author Interview Questions. Seriously people, stop asking the same questions over and over again. Be creative. The more wild and crazy the questions, the more wild and crazy the answers! “So, who is that cross-eyed guy I saw on your Facebook? Is that your man? Are you into cockeyed guys? You can tell us, we won’t judge you.” Readers eat this stuff up.

 

  1. People who keep their air conditioning at 65 degrees or lower.

 

  1. When people think everything is supposed to be free. Everything you have to pay for is not a scam. If you buy into the notion that you are somehow taking advantage of or scamming people just because you are charging for your hard work and time, then you will not make it as an entrepreneur (because you won’t make enough money for it to work. Rent/Mortgage and bills are not imaginary.) As long as you are building trust and adding value (know what you’re talking about), there’s nothing wrong with charging for your service and your time.  Some of you can afford to do everything free. Maybe you got a little change stored away or you just have the time but that’s not everyone’s life. Everybody ain’t got it like that.

 

  1. When people use “Freedom” as an excuse not to believe the truth or justify their wrong. Everyone wants the truth, but no one wants to be honest. There is no freedom without responsibility.

 

  1. When Bloggers create private blogs and really think they’re private.

  1. When people like all your social media posts but don’t reach out to you in real life.

 

  1. Potato chip bags with a handful of chips in them.

 

  1. When relatives spend 364 days not supporting your writing and on the day, you release a book ask, “Where can I buy yo book?” and you never hear from them again.

 

  1. Religious debates from people who hate to hear the truth about their God/Gods. Here’s the thing: Your beliefs don’t make you a better person, your behavior does.

 

  1. Photo-shopped pictures of fast food that looks nothing like the picture in real life.

 

  1. People who walk all over you and then get mad at you for establishing boundaries. Order is not abuse.

 

  1. Racists whites who don’t know that they’re racists and get mad at you for pointing it out.

  1. Telling fast food places not to put mayonnaise on your burger (I hate mayonnaise) and they do it anyway.

 

  1. When people think saying, “I’m not religious, I’m spiritual” makes them deep. Saying, “I’m spiritual” doesn’t make you better than anyone else. What’s better is to just explain exactly what it is you believe in and why (because demons are spiritual too.)

 

  1. People asking, “So what you eat then?” because you said you didn’t eat pork as if no other food exist. (Though I don’t consider pork food)

 

  1. People who compare you to others. Stop saying, “so and so is doing it like this.” I don’t care what so and so is doing. That has nothing to do with me or how I do things.

 

  1. Religious people who act like they never lied, stole, cheated, or whored before. The more relatable you are, the easier it is to reach people. Just saying.

 

  1. and Indie/Trad. Publishing debates about which is better. Seriously people, just pick one that best suits you and move on. (Hint: Both require work)

Yecheilyah is an Independent Author, Blogger, and Poet. Her latest release

Renaissance: The Nora White Story (Book One) is available now on Amazon. 

“The characters all sound real. I really really liked all the dialogues, it seems like hearing true people speaking. Even the crowd scenes (and there are a few in the ‘southern’ thread) are involving and easy to follow.” – Amazon Customer Review