Tag: beauty

Un-Pretty

unpretty

She was fourteen when the uglies came
fourteen when she realized that she was un-pretty
You see her mom’s mother’s mother,
and her mother before that
began the process of digestion that would take place through generational blood cells that rejected what they considered…the uglies.
so she regurgitated this face given her by some fierce creator the moment her life began recycling the cycle of teens who refuse to simply look in the mirror
Why should she?
For the laying on of verbal hands became saliva that practiced the breaking down of insults that made this decision mushy, and easy to swallow
and proactive never helped out,
pushing indoctrination further into her mouth until she has no other choice but to chew smooth skin and straight hair with her teeth
was it her fault?
that when she looked in the mirror a strange girl is all she could see
and positive comments slid off of her chocolate skin like empty belief.
Satisfaction never molding this face into something she could see
Beauty
never pushing its mushed up reality down the back of her throat
this
pretty stuff
never making it through adolescence
never making it through to the esophagus
Un-pretty
It was all she’s known and all she could see
never mind her thought process to ever enter the second portion of the digestive tract
for she was stuck
stuck in a world where beauty rocked air force ones and apple bottom jeans
the prettiest trading her cookies in for a better face
this
pretty little face
or that celebrities were simply pretty little liars
because beauty never came with a price
Un-pretty
It was simply a disease, an infection
moving confidence back to the ugly shaped tears that arose in her throat
that generations of house slaves would teach her to stomach
this mushed up ball of ugly too weak to form strong muscles that could stop it from mixing around images of Beyoncé and her sister Solange,
muscles
that could not stop it from becoming pretty plastic properties of Nicki Minaj
WHO forgot to tell this sista…
That in her world of pretty,
pretty was really
un-pretty?

Diamond in The Ruff

Diamonds on a black background with copy space

I decided to seek strength when pain took it upon herself to become the choir director of humanity

in an anxious quest to play doubt on the strings of our faith she laughs…

coughing up the twisted humor of her bowels you see she knows

that our minds have been twisted by the craftiness of sin still falling from the fingerprints of Eve and  Hiding behind the shame of Adam she knows
The ease to which we are apt to scream we’re not able like the blood of Abel, that at times
our lowliest moments give us in to unbelief like virgins vulnerable to the sensitivity of fleshly skin
Faith giving it up like cracking levees… overflowing with trial & struggle she laughs while you drown in sins pain made you promise to go back to

but you tell pain that we are not bed sheets fitted to the corners of her pride

We are not fools, babbling vain words in her congregation

We are not faithless because of her existence

Tell pain that we wait for her

like crouching tigers with gritted teeth

you tell sorrow that with much wisdom comes much grief

tell her, that we are not children

borne about by every sickness breathed from the viruses she plants in our immune systems 4 we are strong

you tell pain that from her humility is born

like truth when it touched its hands on the insides of Miriam’s womb, the Salvation brought forth from pain

a stake of stabbing wounds
You tell pain that the almighty made sure that everything had its companion

You tell pain…

that Endurance was made for her

Humility

humility-flower1

Humility is loving that which is poor
it is bringing oneself down
becoming a servant to an innermost consciousness
to appreciate that which is forgotten
and insignificant
to relapse back into a state of childhood
where even something as great as a piece of broken glass
seems innocent
where it is not glass
it is not dangerous
it is just a mirror into which we see ourselves