death
it’s sting
produces a humility powerful enough
to find itself a home
even inside the heart of the one
who holds the cup of “I’m sorry’s”
hoping their voice is sad enough
to produce the kind of sympathy
that peels back the brick
that found itself a place
inside the gut of the bereaved
the lump
waiting inside their throats
is this “I’m Sorry” strong enough?
“I’m sorry”
makes me feel guilty
because I know that it is not enough,
in fact
it almost sounds cliché
how can this routine “I’m sorry”
ever guarantee the sincere apology I feel
for the woman
who lost her husband in the hands of doctors
with spines like jellyfish,
the inconsiderate “I’m sorry”
floating out the window of the hospital,
where his breath left it’s good bye on the table
without warning
didn’t want to wake her sleeping gorgeous
so he left in the middle of the night
just to see her smile one last time
for he knew that she would smile
in her dreams
Or the man
who lost his brother with the split of atoms
like storms breaking through to the clouds
like a mother’s arms spread wide enough
to capture his smiles in a bowl
but aint no rainbows today
cause grief
it convinces us that the world
has ceased existing
and molds its rotations to the contours of our hearts
“Why are you sorry?!”
screams the confused silence of my bones
or the unflinching expression of a man’s face
after a life-time of catastrophes
tainted love
chocking dreams
and memories like the scenic route to civil wars
& he wears it all
with a walk like a stone cold killer
and a face fit for poker
but his heart is pale with grief
I know
cause I heard it in his smile
he laughs
but only because his body weeps
too weak internally
to die physically too
so when he grieves
and when she grieves
when their pain is too deep
to find alongside the outline of their faces
too far to find within the pages of their past
but close enough to smell in the sorrow of their loss
in these bags
filled to the brim with all their stuff
what do you say
when the air isn’t pure enough to breathe
and a routine, “I’m sorry” is simply not enough
to convince them
that the world
still spins
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